gray

chapter 1

all i felt was my body plummeting and the dryness in my throat. i was screaming at the top of my lungs, naturally; i was falling through nothing and i was completely helpless. suddenly, my ears were submerged with a gentle tune. familiar, it was, but i was too busy descending and screaming to focus on it. that was until the feeling of falling was gone, and so went the sound of my own screaming. i pried my eyes open and i found myself staring at my ceiling. my favourite song - my alarm - was playing on my phone on my bedside table. i was sweating, but i also felt cold. a cold sweat. i sighed and sat up, reaching over to retrieve my phone from my side to turn the alarm off. thank god i wasn't actually falling. it was just a dream. i scowled and tossed my phone onto the floor, swinging my legs over the side of my bed and planting my feet on the hardwood floor beneath me. my mom was never home when i got ready for school. she had to go to work at 6:30 am, and she always came home at 8 pm. i never saw her because i was always in my room, but it really didn't matter to me.
"god," i muttered under my breath as i pushed my weight onto my legs to start getting ready for school.

it was a crisp 7 am, and i had an hour to get ready for school. not that i needed a whole hour, i just needed about ten minutes. i always set my alarm for seven mainly because i needed the rest of the time to wake up and mentally prepare myself for the school day. i bent over to pick my phone up off the ground before leaving my room, flicking the dim light on just before i passed through the doorway. the first room that my legs took me to was the kitchen. what came next was automatic at that point; i went to the cupboard to grab a box of cereal, then to the fridge for milk, and then to another cupboard for a bowl. i poured my cereal and put everything back, then i got a spoon and scarfed down my breakfast.

when my cereal was gone, i put my dishes in the sink and slumped toward the bathroom. i flipped the lightswitch and, briefly, the bright light shot toward my pupils and blinded me - or that's what it felt like, anyway. my eyes tightly shut, but after a few seconds, i forced them to blink open again. i stared in the mirror when my eyes finally adjusted to the light. my curly black hair hung down on my forehead, the rest of my head covered with a short undercut style. my eyes were the same boring shade of dark forest green, and my pale skin was still covering my muscles and holding in my organs. i had almost forgot that the only thing i was wearing was boxers, so i was a little shocked to see my shirt off. i glared at the mirror for a moment before i continued my morning. i proceeded to brush my teeth, wash my face, piss, all that hygenic stuff. before long i was done in the bathroom and i found myself back in my bedroom. i finished off my morning by putting on my school uniform, and then i grabbed my schoolbag and phone.

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i went to school and i was irrirable. as a matter of fact, that was always the case. i hated school; i hated everything. it always made me burst, being lectured by annoying adults with invalid points about my behaviour. if they wanted me to respect them, they were going to have to have some respect for me. and that was that. i got mad easily and they knew that, but they all still decided to push my buttons just to have a reason to punish me. it was the same with the snobby kids that went to school with me. they always made me mad, and they always faked victimization just to get me into trouble with the teachers. that was the case for years. they all picked on me, laughed at me and looked at me like they were better than me. i was fed up with it, but i knew i needed an education. that was the only reason i continued to go. if i didn't want to be educated, i would've been out of there with the blink of an eye. i moped all the way to my locker and twisted in the combination. i swung open the metal door and grabbed the books i needed for the first class of the day. when my history shit was gathered, i closed and locked my locker again. i adjusted my bag that was hooked on my shoulder and headed toward my homeroom class.

all the piercing chatter of the people around me was only getting me riled up more than i already was, and i let a low hiss escape the back of my throat as my teeth clenched. i flung the door to my homeroom open and immediately maneuvered around the desks in the room to get to my own. i kept my head down, not wanting to look at any of the snobs in the room with me. i let my bag slide off my shoulder before i dropped the strap onto the back of my chair, unzipping it to slide my books inside of it. i then plopped my body into my seat and rested my head on the desk, my eyes shutting in my attempt to calm my nerves. i didn't have any friends at all, which was fine by me. nobody would be able to handle my temper anyway, so i opted to simply stay alone all the time. nothing went wrong for me when i was alone, so i was perfectly okay with it.

i stayed in this trance like state until i heard the shrilling first bell, which caused my eyes to shoot open. i hesitantly lifted my head and replaced the desk with the palm of my hand as i glared at the teacher who was at the front of the room. mr. wood cleared his throat heavily, just like he always did before he started calling out attendance. i rolled my eyes and let my head drop to rest on my desk again, but he didn't start attendance like i assumed he would.
"hello, class. today is a special day. we have a new student joining us. why don't you come in?" he said in his usual monotonous voice, his torso turning to face the open door leading out into the hallway.

in stepped a rather thin boy. he had blonde hair, an undercut like mine. it was tied up in a bun, though. his eyes were brown and he was a little more tanned than me; a regular skin tone, i guess. i'm so pale that i almost glow, but he had a regular white guy skin tone. he seemed a bit timid; he didn't speak once. the teacher introduced him as "grayson", and then told him to take a seat. the only empty seats in the room were the four that surrounded me, of course, and one in the very front of the room. grayson looked at me in a shy manner and grinned slightly. my response was a deadpan look. he started walking toward me to sit near me, but one of the girls who sat in the front had whispered to him, telling him to not to go anywhere near me. he furrowed his eyebrows as he looked at her and sat in front of me anyway.
idiot, i thought to myself.