Estelle

There are endless stories out there. Some have happy endings while others only document things falling apart. Other stories never seem to end at all. The thing that not everyone asks is what happens before the story starts? After all that is a story as well, isn't it? It's the prologue that you sometimes skip when starting a new book or the backstory you may not have heard. Sure, Rapunzel let down her hair so her prince could visit her in her tower but she had to have gotten into that tower somehow. She had parents and a place of birth just like everyone else even if she didn't know them, just as that friend you might have who was adopted did. There's stories there, it's just that sometimes the stories are incredibly short. This story might be one of them. Of course, that depends quite a bit on where you believe "The End" is as it's quite relative. Death isn't always the end and life isn't always the beginning. This story in particular starts at birth and doesn't really end at death at all, not really anyway. Although not everyone knows that.

You see in the early 1840's, the exact year not particularly important, two people fell in love. Samuel was a polite southern gentleman who traveled away from home in search of work only to do the very last thing he expected which was run a shop that sold most any legitimate item he could find to sell. He was a patient hardworking man who wrote home whenever he could because although he liked where he ended up he loved his parents and younger sister. Elizabeth was the kind daughter of German immigrants. She baked and helped those around her whenever she could and despite appearances she could hold her own if someone tried to take advantage of her good heart. What no one realized, even Elizabeth although she probably should have, was that she was a bit extra special as there was a spark of magic in her blood from both sides. Her parents chose not to ever mention it to her for unknown reasons, possibly because it was a subtle trait. Samuel and Elizabeth were completely smitten practically from the moment they met. It was the deep unconditional love that people dream about their whole lives and sometimes never find. And maybe, just maybe, that is where everything went wrong as their story has no happily ever after, but we aren't there just yet.

After a some already wonderful time together they decided to take the next step and marry in the winter air of 1844, all too ready to spend the rest of their lives together. They had a quaint home right outside of town with a beautiful apple tree in front of the house and a stream just past their backyard. They weren't quite as easily gifted in the family way as some of their friends in town but the next winter they discovered it wouldn't be the two of them forever as the gift Elizabeth had growing inside became noticeable. The realization came as a great excitement and as many good fathers do Samuel doted relentlessly on Elizabeth right up until one special night in the early spring of 1846 when the joyous parent's welcomed their child into the world. Estelle Bohnefeld's first moments in this word were under a rainy sky in a nice home with a mother who felt as if she was the luckiest person who'd ever lived and a father who swore, much like he did on his wedding day, that he would never let anyone hurt her. The three of them lived their lives to the best of their ability for a decade. Samuels store continued to do well, they both enjoyed parenthood with no regrets and Estelle had a perfectly happy childhood unlike many children her age. The only flaw was so small they all liked to pretend it didn't exist. That spark of magic Estelle inherited from her mother turned into more than that. The magic in her blood was noticeable to everyone in her family who knew her best. Most everyone would agree it was happily ever after. That is, until quite simply it wasn't.

In the winter of 1856 Elizabeth got sick. It wasn't to worrisome at first, as it started subtly. Not long later they realized it may be serious as she only got sicker and sicker with little notice. Neither of the towns doctors could figure out what was wrong with her, her disease not yet discovered by science, and no matter how much Estelle tried, her magic, although misunderstood, simply didn't know how to heal. If she could have she would have given away every drop of her gifts to help just as her father would have moved heaven and earth if he could. They tried their best in the months Elizabeth was ill to function normally but it took a strong toll, as the pain of watching someone you love waste away would on anyone. It was as if the warmth of their family was being sucked away. Estelle tried her best to do as her mother told her; be a good girl, be kind, and always find a way to smile. That last wish was the one she found the hardest. Samuel didn't know how to face the future and it made him angry. He tried to keep it inside and not let his family see the extent he was struggling but in all honesty, looking back, bottling it up was probably the worst thing he did for his future. Whether or not the decision was good or bad however he bottled it all up, the frustration, grief, and anger. He let it fester and worsen, desperate not to let it affect anyone else, especially not his baby girl who at that point was all he had left of his happily ever after. Unfortunately although he knew it was irrational and he knew that Estelle had done everything she could, part of him was angry with her as well. He couldn't understand why her magic couldn't save Elizabeth any more than Estelle could. That small part of him festered, grew and ate at him just like the rest. He should have let his suffering be known, at least to someone.

It was Mid-spring before Estelle found the will in her to really smile again. It was a perfectly average afternoon in all accounts. Samuel didn't have to man the store that day so instead he watched as she played in the stream behind the house as she often did whenever she could get away with it, and on occasion when she couldn't. Which in reality was the only time she ever broke the rules so she tended to get a fair bit of slack about it. At one point the sun flitted through the trees a brilliant green, reflecting off the water to make it glitter like treasure and make all the new spring flowers seem just that little bit extra special. It wasn't something that hadn't ever happened before but Estelle in that moment smiled wide with a truly warm feeling inside as she realized, much more clearheaded in her grief than her father, that her mother would have loved that day in all it's simplicity. So of course, that's exactly what she said as she was a blatantly honest girl even at the worst of times. She tended to make observations that were truly pure and only ever filtered to make them on occasion less insulting if the situation demanded it. The problem in this, at least at that moment, was that her simple heartfelt statement was - as they say - the straw that broke the camels back.

Something in Samuels mind snapped in two and all of the rage that had been building took over just for a moment. The part of him who hated his baby girl for letting his wife die was in control for that short period of time. It was the rage that acted as he knocked her down and evermore so when, once she'd called out to him in a heartbroken shock, he held her down. For that instant all he and his rage wanted was for her to stop smiling and be quiet. He got both of those things because quite simply the moment of rage lasted too long.

He didn't realize what he'd done at first as he sobered up, the rage dissipating like smoke in the spring breeze. He unfurled his hands from their positions on her neck and shoulders as if he'd been burned while his whole body jerked back away from her in the horror that he'd ever laid his hands on his baby. It wasn't a horror however that would ever really heal, because although he didn't realize at first, his sincere apologies fell on deaf ears. Deaf ears, a still form, and empty green eyes. Once the bitter truth of that grabbed ahold of him he fell silent. The already present guilt magnified and grew in an instant, there wasn't any light left in his world. He prayed to the only god he believed in that by some miracle he could take her place even though he knew it was too late.

He stayed silent for days afterwards, holding on in his darkness to make sure his little Estelle could at least have a place next to her mother. No one understood what had happened, other than that it was a true tragedy, right up until the evening after she'd been buried in her best dress. The co-owner of Samuels shop had come to check on him only to find him hanging from the apple tree, the explanation all written out for the world to know. The truth came as a reverberating shock through the entire town, it made the papers in a way not many small town families did at least in that time. No one could understand how the Bohnefeld's could have fallen so far so fast. It felt like it wasn't real to anyone who knew them, making the house stay vacant for nearly two decades.

Eventually almost everyone forgot their small family ever existed as their friends and family all grew old and then passed on, joining the three of them in death. Decades later there were only two people alive who'd met them or the people they knew. It all came to light again in the distant future, but that's such a different part of the story one could say it's a different story all together. Of course, either way it's a while away. After all, little Estelle Bohnefeld has decades before she even realizes that she doesn't know her own name much less learns it again. She will though, some day. 

...If you'd like to ask me things...