MY FIRST EVERYTHING

i just want to hold you

I woke up today not really remembering i came back to the hotel or anything from last night for that matter. I try getting up but i felt something holding me back and i turned to see that Jack G.'s arm on my waist. Starting to remember what happened at the club i noticed i was half naked. Curious of what else might have happened i looked under the covers to see if jack had his pants. thankfully he just has his jeans on but he is topless mmmmm i dont mind the veiw. I carefully took Jack's warm arm off, got some clothes and went into the shower. After i finished showering, i got dressed into a black crop top and black&white indian print poofy pants then tucked the ends in my combat boots. i left the bathroom and noticed the bed was empty. He probably realized that it was a mistake to stay. I turn back around to the bathroom out of nowhere i was tackled onto the bed feeling strong arms around me to see jack on top of me.

jack"hi there" he says with our faces centimeters apart.

me"hey" i say leaning closer biting my lip. i could see Jack looking back and forth from my eyes to my lips. He started to lean in and we connected lips. The way we both moved in sync was unbelievable. After about 5-10minuntes of kissing i was getting ready to go to the skate park and ride my penny around just to relax myself from the drama.

As i was walking in the hall, i was stopped by the only person that i dont want see Matthew Lee Espinosa. After what happened yesturday i dont know if there will ever be an us besides i have Jack.

Matt"Hey sam where have you been i didnt even see you the whole time last night"ugh he is so pethetic.

Me"Why dont you ask that girl you've been sucking faces with im sure you were occupied with herpes on your lap"i couldnt even stand looking him in the eye.

Matt"Sam i know that might have looked bad but please just let me explain"

Me"Explain what we aren't even dating so you can do whatever you want to do"

Matt"Sam you have to understand that what i did was a stupid mistake "

Me"Matt what if we were dating that wouldnt be a stupid mistake, its you being unfaithful. I couldnt even trust you as a friend or atleast whatever this is."

Matt"Please Sam dont just leave me here i need you in my life. Please give the chance of a life time and let me be your boyfriend." he said while that was being said i couldnt help but to cry.

Me"Look Matt my feelings for you are irreplacable and they arent going anywhere but my trust for you isn't. And whats love without trust Matt.Maybe when you can show me i can trust you again, there isnt going to be an us. So in the mean time i think you have to move on from me."

by the end of my sentence we were both in tears. i didnt even want to go to the skatepark anymore i just turned back and went to my room and cried my eyes out. I dont even feel like i deserve anyone after what i said. I know im a whore or slut whatever but if you were totally inlove with someone and they did that to you wouldnt you do the same. I was interrupted by the buzzing of my phone. looking at the bright screen i saw that Jack texted me. Seeing that he texted brought a smile to my face without hesitation.

JackG<3: hey i need to talk to you its important.Meet me at the docks.

Seeing that kinda made me scared. What if he was telling me he has a girlfriend or maybe he doesnt like me anymore, oh the confusion but right now i shouldnt panic so ill just pretend to be calm.

me: kk see you in a bit.

I ran to the bathroom so I can look how bad the make up was and it was horrifying. All that crying does leave an ugly face huh. I took off all the make up and just put on waterproof mascara cause i feel like theres gonna be some water works tonight. Leaving the hotel i was so nervous of being stopped by Matt again. Suprisingly i made it out the hotel and to the docks but the only struggle is facing Jack hoping he wont break me like Matt. Going to Jack with all types of paranoya.

JackG" hey im glad you can make it"

me" well i wouldnt leave you here waiting"

Jack G"I have been thinking about this for awhile and i really think you should here me out"

me"Please dont tell me your gay" i say closing my eyes to only hear Jack chuckling.(i dont have anything agaisnt gay people my brother is gay so dont get mad be glad.)

JackG"No sam its not that its just that for awhile now i have been having these feelings for you and i cant shake the feeling of not being able to see you every morning and  for you not to be mine and it hurts me to see that you like Matt but today just felt like it was time to actually tell you my feelings and to express myself  in a way that i couldnt before. So before you cut me off i would like to ask you to be my girlfriend?"After holding back all the tears and emotions i finally run up to him and hug him for god knows how long.

Me"Jack you dont know how happy you made me just now.You basically just made my day.And of course i would love to be your girlfriend." with that said i put my hands around his neck and he gently kissed the top of my nose that gave me the biggest exlposion of butterflies ever.

Finally something is going right in my life.