Shower Thoughts and My Mind

Locked Out

Do you ever just feel trapped? Like you are surrounded by doors and choices but you are unable to do anything about it.

Recently I have felt that I am stuck in a circular room full of doors. Each door looks different and is covered in so many locks. They all have something behind them, a choice or an idea. I can't see what is behind them, but I can feel it deep inside.

As I look around the room, I start turning and turning, trying to find anything that can let me out. I can't find anything to let me into the rooms I want to be in but suddenly a door opens up with an option that I don't like, but that makes me feel that there are no other choices.

So, I suck it up and I suffer. I make the choice that I don't like but that everyone else wants. I do what my family wants and what my teachers want. I hide the person I want to be and start to become the person they want me to be. Even if it hurts, even if it causes me pain, it is better than......

.....nothing, it's better than nothing. It hurt's and I am trapped. I am stuck with choices that I want to take and the decisions that I want to make but can not. I can't be that person because other people say so. They dictate my life even if they don't realize it. They seem to give me a choice but I am not allowed to chose. There becomes a right choice and a wrong choice where there does not need to be.