Punchline

Staff Reviews

A little more fun for Jude and Frank. Plus a few other familiar faces.

Sister Jude knocked softly at the heavy oak door. She was expected, but ever respectful. "Come in! Come in." It was her boss' habit to repeat this invitation twice, a familiarity that made her smile.

"You asked for me, Monsignor."

"Sister Jude! Most prompt, as usual." Timothy Howard gestured to the seat across from his desk. "Please, sit." He waited for her to settle in the leather wingback, angled features expectant and patient. He cleared his throat nervously. "Sister." Thought a moment. "Jude."

Her brow quirked. He'd used her name. He wanted something. "Yes, Father?"

"I wanted to begin today by telling you how greatly I appreciate your hard work these last weeks. With the delivery of new equipment, contractors in the building, the bakery expansion..." He raised his hands in a helpless gesture. "And all of this with the daily madness of Briarcliff. Quite honestly, Jude - you are a marvel. And a most valuable asset to the church, and myself."

She hoped she wasn't blushing too profusely, but the heat in her cheeks belied the wish. "Thank you, Father." She looked at her lap - her hands. "I assure you I've enjoyed the challenge."

"You thrive on work, Sister." He nodded. "But you mustn't allow yourself to become overwhelmed."

"Of course not." She smiled. "Mary Eunice and the other sisters have been a great help to me." Truthfully? She was beyond overwhelmed. There were moments when she stopped in a hallway, surrounded by lunatics, and wondered if she wasn't becoming a lunatic herself. More often lately, she entered a room and completely forgot why she entered that room. She found herself randomly crying in the bathtub. Had on more than one occasion laid her forehead against her desk and prayed to as many saints as she could recall in that moment, blood pounding in her ears. But she'd be damned if this man ever knew any of that.

"Well, I'm pleased you're finding assistance." Timothy tapped a large stack of files on his desk. "Because these are staff review forms that are due this Friday. And quite a few of them shall land in your lap, I'm afraid."

She blinked a few times. "Staff review forms?"

"A new objective handed down by the Diocese. A way of inspiring and modeling reformation in the institution system."

"I see." She had no fucking clue.

"I think it's a wonderful idea." He opened a folder. "And I'm pleased to say that yours, Sister Jude, shall be the first one completed." His boyish smile was beguiling. "By me."

"How exciting." She deadpanned.

Timothy chuckled. "Sister. I assure you no one could be more...inconvenienced by this than you and myself. However, we must...play ball, so to speak. With the higher up's. Yes?"

"Of course." She smirked. "So...how exactly is this 'staff review' delivered, Father?"

He cleared his throat officially, produced a pair of tortoiseshell glasses. "Let's find out, shall we?" He peered at the form. She leaned forward expectantly. "Ah. Fairly simple. Here we go. Sister... Jude...Martin." He was writing as he spoke. "How long have you been with us now at Briarcliff?"

"One year, nine months and...twelve days."

He glanced up at her. "Quite exact." She nodded. "We'll just round up. 2 years." He jotted. "As director of this facility, please state three strengths you exhibit in your role."

"Strengths?"

"Yes, yes." He nodded. "Things you're quite good at. First, you state them, and then later I state three that I feel you possess. As your superior."