New Identity

Chapter One

As I sat, attempting to enjoy my only day off my phone rang. I knew exactly who it was. I didn't answer. Then it rang again. This time, I picked up.
"You have a collect call from California State Penitentiary." I quickly pressed zero and immediately felt my blood pressure rising.
"Really Terry? I held you down! I did everything you've asked! I gave you our son! Doesn't that mean anything to you? I was the only bitch that didn't give a fuck about your flaws! How could you do me like that? I was the only bitch who actually wanted something for you, & seen a future in you, I wanted the BEST for you! I was the only bitch who was there for you! Through the good, the bad and the ugly. I seen so many sides of you, I know you better than you do. I know your reactions to any situation... The way you look when something is wrong, the way you walk when your leg starts to bother you, the tone in your voice when you're lying! I was the only person who cared about YOU! I was the only person that listened when NOBODY ELSE DID! I was the person there for you when everybody else switched up & snaked you. Even when your own family was acting funny! I broke my neck EVERY TIME you wanted something, I gave you everything you wanted and more! Even if that meant I had to go without! I lost bonds for you & I don't even give a fuck! I went against the closet to me, got pregnant & let motherfuckers talk down on me because I LOVE YOU! I FUCKING LOVE YOU! And I'd do ANYTHING for you! I took you back & apologized for shit I didn't even do, all because I didnt want to lose you! Even when you embarrassed me, cheated & down talked me in front of everybody! I still stuck with you, I still stayed, I never talked down on you! Even when I saw that your body was right in front of me & your mind was somewhere else... somewhere FAR GONE away from me."
"But baby..." He interrupted.
"But baby my ass! I still believed in you and made a way for myself to think that you were still here. I got into fights with multiple bitches over your dumb ass! Even when you did the most unforgivable shit, I FORGAVE YOU. When your mother, cousins and everyone else gave up I didn't! I never gave up on you, I never turned my back! Even after you gave up on me so many times. After you left and fucked and did whatever! Daily, weekly, monthly, time after time after time....I WAS STILL THERE RIDING FOR YOU TERRY!" I yelled. As Terry sat on the other end of the phone I know he could hear my voice breaking. I was trying to hold back my tears, but that was years worth of pain.
"Baby I know. I'm so sorry. I swear I am. When I come home I'm going to make it up to you and my son. But I gotta go, these guards tripping. I love you babygirl, kiss TJ for—" before Terry could finish his sentence the automated message came through the phone.
"You have one minute remaining." I sniffled, "Yeah. Whatever T, I'm not putting anymore money on this phone. TJ needs diapers, and you'll be home next week anyways. We love you. Goodnight baby."
"Good—" Click.
"DAMN! I can't stand when that shit hang up, damn I miss my baby man!" I threw the phone on the bed, and picked up my son out of his crib. "Come'on TJ, don't cry baby. Let's go take a bath and eat some peas and rice your Grandma made. Daddy will be home in 5 more days. And everything will be back to normal." I hated knowing that Terry cheated on me. But I just couldn't push myself to actually leave. I wanted the perfect family. I didn't want us to fall into the stereotype young blacks with a baby. I wanted my child to be under the same roof as both parents. Not having to decide which holidays would be spent at which parents house. I sighed and decided to do something with myself. Instead of thinking about Terry. I can only hope that he's going to do what's right this time.

I looked at the time. I thought to myself, "Good, only 1:30. I still got a few hours to catch a nap before I head to work. And the best thing,  TJ has just went to sleep." I walked into the kitchen of my 2 bedroom apartment, I shared with my best friend and began to throw together some Hamburger Helper. I was expecting Gabby to come home from work around 2:30. Since it was nice outside I also planned on taking a walk, I was still trying to lose weight 9 months after my baby boy.
Terry was a dealer, a shooter and a fighter. Terry was about his shit. The whole city knew it, and being his bitch made me one of the most hated females. So many females wanted to be in my position, and sometimes Terry's dumb ass made them think they could. He'd cheated on me once before, we broke up for 3 months. Then I found out I was pregnant. That's why TJ didn't get his father's name. His name is Tyrell, not Terry. But this damn boy is his fathers twin. So he's still a junior. He has beautiful hazel eyes that make your heart melt too! His mother, Mrs B and his little sister Kiera have them  as well. I was beginning to miss my so called "in-laws". We'd been dodging them these last 3 months, hiding that Terry was back in prison. Luckily we had a good lawyer, so he received a minimum plea and even got out a month early on good behavior. Momma B had called a few weeks ago inviting us over but I told her we were all home, sick. We were doing pretty good at hiding it too, when Kiera text his phone asking for the newest Jordan's I would order them and get them sent to her house or even have one of his close homeboys drop them off to his mom's. Kiera was spoiled too. Her mother paid for all her extra-curriculum activities, and gave her 200 dollars for maintaining grades, after checking every week. Terry sent her 500 dollars every two weeks just because. Since she was the baby girl she definitely got the most attention. Low-key, I was hating. I wish I was getting bank like that at 15. While he was away he didn't ask about Kiera, he hated being away from her and I knew it. He said he wouldn't stress too much because their cousin Wreck had moved into Momma B's.
Terry took good care of us. All of us. Sometimes, he'd send Wreck or Slim over here to check on us. They stayed down near the block, where shit was hot. Momma B had the nicest house down there. The prettiest house. Terry and Wreck dared the wind to even blow too strong near Momma B's. If something happened around there, they'd turn the city up. Slim was right behind them. See, Terry and Wreck were cousins. They've always been very close. Wreck's dad, Uncle Jamison was on crack. Real bad, sometimes he came begging Terry to "show love" when he didn't have money to buy any himself. Wreck's momma ran off with some white man when he was a child, at least that's what Terry said. But the streets told me otherwise. And I wasn't exactly sure what had happened to Slim's father, but he wasn't around. But my dad dated Slim's mom before she passed. He was like the little brother I never had. Sometimes after he got out of school he would come over, eat and do homework. Then he'd give me a couple hundred dollars and say, "Sis, it's Unc and Nep time. You gotta bounce." And other times he'd come over and cook for me and Gabby. Then he'd say, "You look like a tired mom. Go lay down, you know I'm like AllState baby. My nephew is in good hands." Either way it went, I was appreciative.
The time was now 3:00. I began to wonder where Gabby was, when Slim called my phone.
"Yurrpp!" Slim said when he answered on the other end. I could hear him smiling through the phone.
"Boy what you so happy for? You ain't been over here to see your nephew yet. He missed you this weekend. And I got a surprise for you! So what's up with you? Where ya at?" I asked.
"Damn investigator, that's a lot of questions ain't it? And a surprise? For me? Girl, it ain't Christmas. What you want Dime? I'm broke. I'll bring you some money tomorrow. But I just spent what I had in my pockets on my food, and something else. But I need your advice on something anyways sis. So I'll be there soon." He replied. Slim...asking for advice? Aw shit. Here we go, I hope my little brother is not in any trouble. These niggas love to run to me when they get into some shit.
"Alright. Grab a cigar Quan, please?" I asked as I lit half of a blunt.
"Man, get off my phone with that police shit. I'm at the corner store now. I'll be there in 5. And I hope you not expecting no fruity ass cigar, cause I'm not smoking that. Hell nah." He said laughing.
"Boy, fuck you! Like it or not your name is Daquan!Your hoes call you Slim, I'm family. And I refuse. Strawberry White Owl me, please. I don't want your basic cigar smoking ass lips on my shit anyway!" I said dying laughing, hanging up the phone. That boy is so stupid. But I love him to death. About 5 minutes later, Slim walked through the door. He came and jumped on top of me, while I was trying to catch up on my Love & Hip Hop.
"Wassup G? You missed me?" He asked smiling from ear to ear. Still laying his fat ass across me. Once he saw my face, he immediately got defensive. "The fuck wrong with you girl?" He asked. I could tell by the look in his eyes he was ready to go hurt somebody.
"I need..I need..." I gasped for air, smiling. "WATER. Water!!" I mimicked the Spongebob scene and busted out laughing. He fell to the floor laughing.
"Man. See, yo ass play too much! Here! Take yo funky ass cigars!" He said, throwing them onto the couch. He got up and walked into my room, retrieving all of my pothead materials.
"Nightstand, top drawer. Everything's in place." I yelled, as he walked down the hall. He returned with TJ, and my smoker's tray.