The Friendly Battle & Other Pokemon One-Shots

Hoppity Learns the True Meaning of Ice Skating

Hoppity was released into the middle of a cacophony. People were everywhere, talking and moving and eating and laughing. Next to her, Chamander was looking around.

"So!" Miki said from her perch on Machamp's shoulder, repocketing their pokeballs. "In front of us -" Hoppity looked up from the floor to see more distant floor, covered in people moving around in inefficiently curved lines. "- is a skating rink! And you guys can play on it because this one's for pokemon! So Machamp is going to walk me around for a bit and you guys can stay over here. And you're not going to fight anybody, right? Because you have the Thunderbadge now and that's proof you're great at battling."

Hoppity nodded. "I won," she said.

"Great! Have fun!"

Charmander walked up to the railing and ducked under. "Come on, Hoppity! I saw this on TV once." She put a foot down on the different ground. It slid out from under her and she fell. Oh! It was made of ice. That was why the air was so damp here. "I also saw that on TV," Charmander continued, claws scrabbling as she tried to get upright. "It's normal to take a few tries to get your balance. Don't be scared."

"I'm not!" Hoppity approached the railing. "How do you win this?"

"You don't."

"I can so!" Hoppity's tail lashed back and forth.

Charmander sighed. "I mean it's not something people win. It's just playing." She let go of the railing and wobbled. "See, now I know how to -" She tipped forward, claws digging into the ice for a second before she lost her grip completely and landed on her belly. "I'll know how soon. And then I can zip around like everyone else is, and have fun, without having to kick anybody."

Hoppity pondered this for a bit while Charmander pulled herself up on the railing. As Charmander began moving her feet experimentally, Hoppity asked, "Are you lying?"

Charmander nearly slipped again but caught herself. "What? No! About what?"

"About winning. You're bad at this so you could be lying so I don't know you're losing. If you are," Hoppity continued magnanimously, "it's okay because I don't care if you lose. But I really need to know how I win it if it's something you win."

"THIS IS REALLY NOT ABOUT WINNING!"

"Oh." Hoppity sat down. "That's boring then. I don't know why you're bothering."

A horrible thing glided by and did a twirling spin on one leg, sparkles flying everywhere. Noises came out of the horrible thing: "Because this is awesome and you're just jealous you'll never be this good."

"I hate you! What are you?"

"Hoppity!" said Charmander. "Manners!"

The horrible thing made a laughing sound. The ice was moving under the thing's claws, tiny shifts but Hoppity couldn't see how, couldn't see any of how the horrible thing did it. "Wow, you don't even know about sneasel?"

"Why aren't you like everything's supposed to be! I can't see you you're awful!"

Still twirling, the horrible sneasel thing crossed her arms. "I am exactly like I'm supposed to be, thank you." She cocked her head. "Huh. You're a mess, aren't you?"

"I am not!" Hoppity wailed. "I'm the best!"

"She's just a baby," Charmander said.

"Are you, like, blind?" the horrible sneasel thing asked. She waved a claw at Hoppity. "I may not recognize it but that pokemon's, what, two-fifty, three hundred pounds? Looks like it'd be bigger than a machamp if it stopped hunching so bad. Just because it's some idiot failure who can barely talk doesn't - "