Poplani OneShots

Bittersweet Heart

This is an Angst story. Not into angst? Just head to the next chapter.

At first it was Dale. A really nice boy with a big heart and a bright smile. He made Poppy laugh. Helped her forget the world, if only for a few moments and brought her into something new, even if it was short lived. Their time didn't last long, but to Kalani it was long enough. It broke Poppy when Dale left, but Kalani was always there to pick up the pieces one more time.

Kalani fixed her up. Glued her heart together and smiled for her best friend. Her roommate of two years now, she was always there when Poppy needed her. Yet, she wished she could be there more. She wished that one day Poppy would look at her and see that she was there, as she had been all along, and feel for her the way Kalani felt everyday. So much love held in her heart, yet never any given back.

Kalani had always hoped that she would see past the screen of friendship, and walk into the world of love that Kalani clung so dearly to. Everything about Poppy was perfect, and it was so cruel that Kalani was the only one who was not allowed a small piece of heaven that the angels had sent down.

Poppy was her small piece of paradise. An island of beautiful flowers surrounded by an ocean of pain and fear. Kalani swam through those waters everyday. Didn't complain, and never stopped, she wanted so badly to taste the sweet plants that inhabited the island. To be one with the goddess that ruled above all else. She never wanted to give up, because if she stopped then she would maybe lose her chance.

There were times when giving up was all she wanted to do, she wouldn't lie, that sometimes she wanted the waters to drown her, to stop swimming and let it all fall down and consume her, but that fleeting thought that maybe one day she would find the happiness she needed so drastically kept her afloat. Drowning in the waters that she had fought against for so long would be a waste. If she continued to fight then maybe, maybe one day, she would see the light that Poppy barely shined down upon her, bask in the glow of love that she had wanted to touch since the day she met her.

So Kalani was there. And next up was Daniel. Smart guy he was, Daniel would go places, but as soon as Kalani met him she knew it wouldn't last. Poppy's and Daniel's pathways were not two that crossed. And soon the question came up, what was more important, their love for each other, or the work that Daniel barely stayed away from. Poppy hadn't liked the answer, so just like Dale, Daniel walked out of their lives. Leaving Kalani to pierce the veil once again, and recraft the shattered heart of her friend.

Whispered words of console on their white couch. Late into the night of Poppy crying out of those ocean eyes. Salty liquid just like the sea itself, masking that beautiful face in one of such sadness. It hurt Kalani to see her this way, broke her heart that Poppy tried so hard to find someone to love yet never fully found one that stayed. But, the bitterness in her heart increased. For how long could she walk on by, act as if Kalani had no feelings. At this point Poppy could not have been so naive. Kalani basically fawned whenever the girl walked by, but still, nothing.

Biting back her words and the bile that arose with it, Kalani stayed quiet. Deciding that with Poppy's happiness came suffering, and Kalani would never wish that upon her. Even if it killed her, she would take the pain that Poppy unknowingly gave, and allow for the happiness that Poppy so desperately craved. Maybe one day Kalani would just get over it. Realize that the petty feeling of sadness and hurt that Poppy had handed her would go away. Maybe she would wake up one day and think that Poppy was not the perfect angel sent from above. Or maybe she would wait and hope that something in Poppy would change.

She had assumed, that Poppy would have taken a break. After so many failed relationships maybe some time was needed, but no, again she was pulled into another corner of life. Watching silently as another man swooped in and stole the heart that Kalani could just barely touch. A thief in the night he was, and Kalani wished she had tried to protect her fragile heart so much better.

His name was Chad, and he was dangerous. Poppy fell so quickly Kalani hadn't even time to catch her. To stop her from making the mistakes of what was next. She couldn't fall like this. That was rule number one, but Kalani was much to late. Maybe it was his accent, or maybe the way he charmed, but Poppy was gone before Kalani even had time to tie her down.

When he left it broke her the most. Not even Kalani could help her out of this hole, and with every passing day Poppy buried it all. She stopped coming out of the room. Kalani knocking for what seemed like hours to even get the girl to eat. It was terrifying how easily Poppy was taken down, but as quickly as it happened, it stopped. By the snap of Kalani's fingers it was like Poppy changed, and it felt off.

Poppy just walked out one day, a bright smile on her face, and a unknown pain in her deep blue eyes. Kalani had been suspicious, but she let it go, allowed for Poppy to do things that she had missed for as long as her heart had been shattered. But Poppy was not a master. Unlike Kalani, Poppy could not fix her heart completely as new, and she seemed to have lost the pieces that really made her feel. Pieces Kalani held in her own soul, just for Poppy.

It was like the dam breaking. Poppy's heart now broken and unfixable. A parade of people seemed to come in and out. Men and women who never stayed long, only there to help find the pieces Poppy was missing after Nathan had taken them. Don't get it wrong, they were not rebounds. Even Kalani could see that, but they were not there to be 'the one'. They were there to help Poppy feel something again. She wanted to fall so quickly as she had done before, but in her mind it was like Chad was the only one she would ever have that with, so she continued. Never looking past and seeing Kalani who watched and waited.

As bitter as Kalani became, as heartbreaking as it was to see Poppy ache, Kalani was just the roommate. Just someone Poppy could turn to when things went wrong, but never someone who was in the running when everything was right. A cruel cycle, yet one she lived by, because if she wasn't there to help, would she be needed at all? It scared Kalani to think that if she spoke out she would be the next thing that left Poppy's life. Such a selfish thing to think, but she couldn't live if she did not have some part of Poppy.

Even if all she had were the few pieces of her broken heart left. What she hadn't given to Poppy to fix her up. And even less everytime those ocean blue eyes started to cry. She was happy. A bittersweet sorrow lied in Kalani's  tale, but she had never known better. Love to her was allowing for the one you loved to be happy. Even if it tore you up everytime. She loved Poppy and she knew she was not the one. But she would be damned if anyone tried to take her place. If she at least occupied one spot, then the bittersweet love story was the only one she sought.

Her tale was one for time. The way a girl loved left so much to be desired. Yet so little that would be needed, because Poppy never found her happy ending, and neither did Kalani. Both ended up on their own paths. What ifs clouding their minds and maybes always coming up. It was sad, honestly how easily one fell for the other, yet so heartbreakingly easy for the other to dismiss it. Kalani  had tried until the very end to love Poppy, and maybe Poppy had loved her back.

If either had ever stopped to think about what should have been done then maybe they would have had a happily ever after. Maybe their lives would have been more than just roommates and after sometime maybe they would have been together. But one never spoke, and one never let herself feel. A cold feeling that neither ever let heal.