Glamour

2016-2017

Through the summer, I was sad more often than normal.

Obviously, I was still happy and energetic, but when I was alone and had time to think.. I would cry.

I don't know what happened to me, and I started to hate myself more for that.

I ignored it though and went on as normal, still oblivious to the elephant in the room.

The towering, space taking monstrosity that I seemed to miss no matter what.

It was just the week before summer, and I got a text from Jade.

Faintly confused, I opened it. She never texts first.

It was simple enough.

"Hey"

But it made my heart flutter.

No matter how much she hurt me with our breakup, I still liked her.

Like I said.. I missed the giant elephant.

"Hey"

"How're you?"

"Like always. I could be doing better"

And it continued like this..

Until she asked me out.

Again.

And you know what? I said yes.

What elephant? I don't see one.

~•~

So, the year started. I walked into my homeroom with a red face, desperate to see Jade.

I searched for her face and quickly took a seat as close to her as I could, grinning happily.

"H-Hey." I mumbled shyly to her.

"Hey." She responded.

And that's how it went.

~•~

We were on and off for a while.

In that time, I helped her form the first GSA in the county.. It was the best thing ever.

I was relatively happy that year.

Especially when Jade and I dated.

Yet slowly, the elephant in the room grew and grew until it forced me against the wall and made me notice it.

That was it - I was in love with Jade.

Hopelessly.

Now, I know what you're thinking.

You're too young to know what love is, it's just kiddy romance!

But oh no. No, no, no. It was much stronger than any little crush I'd ever had on someone.

I may seem crazy saying this - but I was infatuated with Jade. Every little thing about her just set me off.

She was perfect to me in every way.

I considered her the prettiest girl in the entire school - no one rivaled her in my book.

No one.

Her confidence and uncanny ability to block out what anyone thought of her just drew me to her.

I spent my days hoping we could get back together.

I was desperate, and foolish.