It came back
I'm sorry
You wonder why I apologise
Because i let myself down
I worked so hard... so hard.
To push and push and to be strong.
But one situation triggered it.
You.
You decided to leave. And that's fine I won't beg you to stay. You weren't meant to be a resident in the place
My life
You were merely only a visitor.
You had a shorter stay than most expected
I wish you could stay but its wasn't written for you I guess
So I must let you go
The pain I have felt has been intense
Almost unbearable to an extent, can't breathe
a strong tightness in my heart.
One thing could numb the pain though I shake the idea out of my head. It's not worth it, don't do it.
"Try not to take it out on yourself, you are not th fault"
Says the sensible part of my brain, but the other parts are louder and then coerce me to pick up the silver glistening metal and end the pain. I shouldn't I know I shouldn't. It isn't me. I can beat this
Can I though? Maybe it can help, with the flick of the silver, much relief yet to come.
Maybe one go will help ease the pain and suffering. Worse thing is I realise my situation is not dire, but everyone has their own demons and mine currently are here to play and wreak havoc.
I'm not as strong as I built myself to be anymore. Its gone. One trigger and I'm back to my low point, but not my lowest..yet
