Chapter 1
I woke up to the ringing of the alarm clock.
“Oh my flaming $%!S,” I shouted in rage.
I smashed my hand on the damn thing and wnet back to sleep. Who cares that it’s my first day back at school?
“HONEY,” my mom shouted up at me. “YOUR LATE FOR SCHOOL.”
I got up and brsuehd my teeth and showered and thought about school and......
OH NO! The world is gonna end! I haven’t told you what I look like!
My name is Sunflower Angelica Rhodesia and I;m 5 foot 5. I have curves in all the right places with shoulder length brown hair that flows perfectly. My eyes are sparkling and green and I;m as skinny as hell. Everyone thinks I;m a fox, but really I;m an ugly moron.
I have paretns isues because my dad died two years ago. I;m not that sad because it seems to make this story a little bit more interesting.
“HONEY, YOUR FRIEND IS HERE!”
Suddenly my best friend Rosemary was in my room. She’s super-hot. Like model-hot. She could model for sure. She’s blonde with blue eyes snd is skinnier than me. She wears revealing clothing and likes to sleep around with all the boys but she’s not a slut. No way.
“Hey, Sunflower,” she said.
We air-kissed and then I packed my bag for school.
We drove in Rosemary’s vauhaull zafiria, registration 45656574, registration plate GTD 54G, built in the year 2003, with a mileage of 435.
The first lesson of the day was English, which was my ultimate worst subject. Rosemary and I had to sit apart and the class waited for the teacher to arrive. I was on my own because I have no friends (other than Rosemary, who is not a slut).
Suddenyl the teacher strode in and I almost had a heart attack.
He was so smoking hot I thought I might fan-girl over him and then die. Girls wolf-whistled and my not-slut best friend licked her lips and winked at him. But he looked straight at me with his perfect emerald eyes...
WAIT, HOLD THE BLOODY FONE! You need to know what hotness looks like.
He was about 6 foot three with emradl eyes and wonderfully scruffily sexy black hair. His nose was perfect and his chin was sculpted. Beneath the t shirt he was wearing I could see the outline of a twenty four point five pack.
Anyway, he looked right at me and I knew, in that instant, that he was mine.
“Hello class,” teach said after he averted his eyes. “My name is Mr Goldsparkle and I will be your new teacher.”
Sunflower Angelica Goldsparkle had a certain ring to it.
I didn’t listen for the whole lesson, but I instead looked at Mr Goldsparkle and admired his phoar-worthy looks.
As the lesson came to an end, the class shuffled out and Mr Goldpsarkle pulled me aside.
“Hello delicious,” he said as he licked his lips. “You’re my mate.”
“I;m your WHAT!”
“my mate. We’ll be mates and shit and we’ll have lots of werewolf babies.” He narrowed his eyes and grinned.
“WEREWOLF!”
He went in to kiss me and I kissed back. GOD- even his lips were smoking hot. We kissed deeply and he started taking my shirt off, exposing my so-not-hot body. The bell rang and he leapt back.
“I’ll see you after school,” he said and I left.
Just to be clear, this is a parody. Every spelling mistake is intentionally and every cliché is deliberate. I’ve seen so many of these and I just wanted to try it out for myself.
And, in good old fashion fan-girl style, I want a gazillion and twenty three votes before I uupload the next chapter.
