He saved me

I don't believe you

-Emilys POV-

I ran home from work, My hair was flying in my face so I stop to pull my red hair into a loose ponytail before continuing to run. I finnaly get home and stick my key into the lock turning it, and let myself in.

"Finally! I thought something happened to you! Why the hell are you so late?" I heard my friend Lily ask me. I turn to see her with a worried expression and her hands on her hips

"I know I'm sorry, I had to stay late to help clean up" I apologise feeling guilt fill me

"you could have given me a ring so I wouldn't have worried" she mumbled

"My phone died. I'm really sorry" I replied sitting down

I hear her sigh before grumbling that it was fine

"but I did bring you something from work" I add quickly

I see her eyes light up. She loves the bookstore that I work at, if anything, she should work there since she loves it so much

"What did you bring me?" She starts jumping around asking like a 5 year old

I pull out the copy of The Scorch Trials watching her gasp and reaches over to squeeze me

"Thank you, Thank you, thank you!" she squeals

I assure it was no big deal and I watch her begin to flip through the pages

"Oh! I forgot, I made I dinner" she sings

My face drops. "oh" I reply

Seeing my reaction her smile begins to fade from her face

"you have to eat Em" she says quietly

"I know that, I have been" I lie

"Are you lying to me?" I hear her ask

"I wouldn't lie to you" I say. I hate lying to her face. But this is important to me. I can't let her know what has been happening.

"I know you wouldn't but the thing is.. I don't believe you" she replies quietly and I know she feels guilty saying she doesn't believe her best friend

"We can eat right now, I'll eat it all, I promise." I offer her and I see her smile slightly

"okay" she breathes out

I follow her into the kitchen and see two plates of spaghetti on the table. I exhale, I sit down and begin to reluctently eat it. I see her smile as she watches me swallow the food.

"So.. You know that guy that you work with?

"Which one?" I ask confused where this conversation was going

"Ashton" she replies blushing

I suddenly get the picture

"Does Lily have a crush on Ashton?" I tease

"No!" she replies quickly "I barely know him, I mean he's good looking, sweet and he has these really pretty eyes and he is-"

"I'll talk to him about you if you stop rambling about him" I offer

She blushes, protesting that she wasn't rambling

"What time is it?" She asks before looking at the clock and rushing to get ready for something, not giving me time to give her an answer

"Where are you going?" I question

"I promised Jack that I would meet him at the shopping center" she explains quickly before leaving out the door

When she walks out the door I throw away the rest of my spaghetti, thinking about how much food I just ate. I walk to the bathroom and look in the mirror slowly lifting up my shirt to look at my stomach.

Fat. That's all I see when I look. Its disgusting and I just want to rip it off my body but I can't. Tears slip out my eyes. I'm fat. I'm ugly. I wonder why Lily is even friends with me. I look disgusting. I'm embarrasing.  No one would ever want me. I'm worthless.

A few minutes later I'm kneeled over the toilet. I vomit, letting my dinner out. Tears blur my vision and I feel some trail down my cheeks.

"Em?" I hear a small voice whisper behind me

Shit. I turn around and I see Lily with teary eyes

"You told me you stopped." She choked out

Im sure I look as guilty as I felt. Tears begin to pool in my eyes

"You. Told. Me. You. Stopped." she said a bit louder "You lied to me" she accused

"Lil-"

"You said you wouldn't lie to me" she whimpered betrayal in her voice

"This is important to me Lily"

"THIS IS IMPORTANT?" I wince at her loud tone. She never yells.

"HOW IN HELL IS THIS IMPORTANT?"

"I'm so fat." I whisper. Her face softens

"Em.." She whispers bringing me in for a hug "You are not fat. You are perfect. You are the best person ever. You are beautiful and you need to believe that."

I try to believe her words. I try to find truth in them but I can't. I want to tell her I'll stop, but it's impossible for me. So I do the next best thing.

I lie.

"Ill try to stop. I promise."