Since When? [Gratsu]

Beyond Fools - Chapter 5

Sorry I haven't published in a while . . . there's this thing called procrastination.

No excuses, I was just being rude to my readers, sorry.

Hope you enjoy(?)

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The name struck everyone's heart, not liking what their minds were trying to convince them about the upcoming song. For all hell, now they were sure their friend had lost his sanity by one simple word that indicated so; events were dropping into negativity fast, huh?

A slow and steady beat suddenly came through the radio, signaling the starting of the song. It was quite low and practically silent, forcing some nudges at a certain bluenette to turn it up. In doing so, a few of the members secretly tapped their foot into the rhythm.

Everything is said and done
Everyone has had their fun
Time to make my exit from this
Fairytale
My departure was foreseen
From the very beginning
Assume life of insanity
Sayonara

Such a soft and soothing voice rang out, earning a few smiles here and there by the very calming of his tone, but there were also some etched eyebrows from the very words that were spoken in this voice.

A small handful of people felt guilty as they were the few who understood the phrases to an extent. "My departure was foreseen" hit them the most, knowing full well how-- indeed- ignorant they all were to his mental state.

Hello, Nice to meet you
you seem familiar
Have I met you before?
Goodbye, Sweetie
Nice to see you
Haven't talked in quite a while

Many were confused by these few lines. Wondering if he was struggling to remember a person in particular-- or perhaps trying to recall his very sanity; a majority thought the latter was a preferable choice (logically speaking), but that only seemed to cause further grieving.

iNSaNiTY
The weight of the air is torture

As quickly as the wind, Levy thought to pull out a note pad, writing down the lyrics as they went, so she can inspect them for evident reasons afterward. Although, as she did this, she couldn't prevent the small droplets from falling onto the thin papers, smudging writing as her body shook in- not guilt per se, but in shame and disappointment towards herself, adding on with a chunk of sadness for her friend.

PSYCHoPaTHY
Don't know who I am anymore
iNSaNiTY
The illusion of ignorance
CaPTiViTY
Why don't you take a chance?
iNSaNiTY
The weight of the air is torture
PSYCHoPaTHY
Don't know who I am anymore
iNSaNiTY
The illusion of ignorance
CaPTiViTY
Try to stop it from corrupting

The wording was said in such a way, a few figured it was talking between "Insanity," "Captivity" and "Psychopathy." Although, they didn't believe the aspects were conversing with each other, rather the aspects were "saying" what they meant to a certain person. They were unsure of this assumption, but they brushed off trying to  (helplessly) decipher it as everyone took one glance at the script-mage to understand she was jotting down what seemed to be lyrics.

I was never meant to be
This paintings main centerpiece
Hidden in a corner my outlines are fading
The days have turned into night
Darkness has consumed the light
Assume life of insanity
sayonara

No one could completely blame a great number of their confusion, they specialized in fighting, not thinking. Even so, it hit them like a spear to the heart once they heard the fourth and fifth lines, assuming it was connecting to both his mind and emotions. They wanted nothing more than to scream bloody-murder towards the open air, but all their bodies allowed were the near-silent sobs as they bit down on their lips, seething red.

Hello, Nice to meet you
you seem familiar
Have I met you before?
Goodbye, Sweetie
Nice to see you
Haven't talked in quite a while

iNSaNiTY
The weight of the air is torture
PSYCHoPaTHY
Don't know who I am anymore
iNSaNiTY
The illusion of ignorance
CaPTiViTY
Why don't you take a chance?
iNSaNiTY
The weight of the air is torture
PSYCHoPaTHY
Don't know who I am anymore
iNSaNiTY
The illusion of ignorance
CaPTiViTY
Try to stop it from corrupting

My heart
Why won't anyone
Notice the torment
This madness is causing
Terror of my own
Self-conscious mind's
Persecution
I won't survive like this

Oh god. All tried to gulp down the persistent plead to just cry out in tears, but they simply couldn't keep it up. To hell with appearances and volume, nothing could stop their arching backs, relentless screams of apologies and frustration, clenched fists, and shut tight eyes pooling with endless tears. Even the more apathetic and neutral people looked downwards in shame as they tried not to clutch their heads with too much force, failing to stop their nails from breaking through layers of skin.

It was so infuriating because no one felt as though they had the right to cry.

sAnIty
Light is peaking through the darkness
pUrIty
Can't feel any more of the stress
sAnIty
It's already fading away
crUElty
Instincts controlling me

The blue-haired mage couldn't seize the tears, the help of her palms only pursuing them in betrayal. Gajeel saw the struggling, taking the book into his hands as he fought his very own emotions to the extent to be able to write down whatever he heard.

iNSaNiTY
The weight of the air is torture
PSYCHoPaTHY
Don't know who I am anymore
iNSaNiTY
The illusion of ignorance
CaPTiViTY
Why don't you take a chance?
iNSaNiTY
The weight of the air is torture
PSYCHoPaTHY
Don't know who I am anymore
iNSaNiTY
The illusion of ignorance
CaPTiViTY
The corruption has taken me  

This time around, there was no silence. Instead, the whole guild-hall was erupting in screams, cries, and grunts in regret even before the song ended.

The answers they found? Their absolute obliviousness. They could hardly say they were "great" friends of Natsu's, they couldn't even do as much as identify if he was hurting or hiding behind a mask. Hell, they'd go as far as to call themselves arrogant. Selfish even.

Being caught up in their own sorrow, they'd never even considered the possibility of their Dragon Slayer's misery. They were only worried about their own mishaps, they hadn't bothered to give any support for him. Sure, it was important for one to care for themselves, but they hadn't even batted an eye towards him, all the while he kept everything bottled up and cared for each and every one of them.

They felt terrible. Stupid. They were all fools to have not known that even the brightest of lights could be overcome with the darkest of shadows. He was their fire, but every fire starts from and because of the cold night, only to eventually end and lose its spark; having the darkness overrule the other. It was their job to have been there as support, to be the wood to their fire and keep it going on eternally.

And yet, they had failed.

And they never even noticed.

Never realized that each and every one of them was swimming in such bleakness.

Forget stupid, for they have far surpassed the meaning of foolish.

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