I Still Like His Shitty Hair [Kiribaku]

The Sun Will Set for You

Kirishima stood at the railing on his balcony, not unlike he had the night before, and stared out at what he could see of the stars. He was exhausted from crying but the reprieve that sleep would allow him never came. He'd given up on trying to sleep after tossing and turning for a couple of hours.

Katsuki's stuff was all still here. He'd expected him to come back for it when he was out but it still sat at the foot of the bed.

He tried again to swallow down the lump in his throat that the thoughts of Kat dragged up.

The older, more polished version of the boy he'd given his heart to was different to the explosive teen he'd first fallen for. There was a simmering heat to him now; still fire, but not just the explosive kind. A heat that smoldered, intense and deep.

A heat that could destroy him very easily if he let it.

But time hadn't just changed Katsuki, Kirishima wasn't the same boy he'd once been either. Sure, he was still lighthearted and wanted to help everyone but he was also determined and sure of himself.

He'd thought himself sturdy enough to withstand Katsuki's explosive nature.

In his own way, Bakugou had taught him to see the good in himself the way he saw it and Katsuki's love had slowly melted away his insecurities leaving a more confident, manly version of himself in their wake.

Rather than revert back to his old ways when Kat wasn't in his life, he'd worked on finding himself without Katsuki there to reassure him and he genuinely liked the man he'd become. It didn't stop him from feeling like something was missing from his life though after spending so much time with Kat, knowing what could have been.

A wet drip hit his forearm and he wiped it away, not even realising that he'd started crying again.

Kirishima felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and nearly dropped it in his haste to answer but the caller ID wasn't who he had set his hopes on.

"Hey, Mina."

He thought he'd masked the disappointment in his tone well enough but he figured Mina knew him better than that because her voice was gentle when she answered.

"Hey sweetie. Kami said you hadn't replied to any of his messages and he's worried about you. Everything ok?"

He breathed out a sigh, there was no use lying to her. He'd known Mina for so long, he could confide in her easily. "Not really."

"Wanna talk about it?"

He didn't know where to begin and he was sure the story came out disjointed and confusing but Mina listened quietly until he was done.

"Kiri, remember when we started high school? The first time I saw you with your new hair?"

Kirishima nodded even though she couldn't see him.

"You told me there would be no regrets for you. Not anymore. That you were going to be a hero that protects others.

"I think maybe you took it a little too far, protecting someone who doesn't always need to be protected. Bakugou is a hero too, one who can handle himself. Usually. I think you need to let him.

"You two have an awful habit of trying to do what's best for the other without really asking what the other actually wants."

Her advice was a little cryptic but it also made so much sense. A life without regret. That's what he'd told her.

They talked for a few more minutes before he quietly thanked her and her last words floated down the line.

"Get some sleep, Kiri, it sounds like you've done enough thinking for one day. And for God's sake message Kami back soon, hun. He's worried about you too."

Bakugou raised his fist and knocked on the door.

It took a few minutes before he heard noise coming closer from the other side and he stiffened in anticipation.

The door swung wide and he suddenly didn't know what to say. He wasn't even sure how or why he had ended up back here.

"Mom." The single word slipped out, his voice broken and harsh.

"You little shit. I don't see you for over a year and when you finally come home it's in tears."

Bakugou looked down at his feet.

His mom reached for him and for the first time in a very long time, he let her. She wrapped him in her arms and held him quietly while the tears fell freely and sobs wracked his body. Then she held him until his tears stopped and he could breathe again.

She quietly stepped away from him but he didn't know what to say.

"It's that boy, isn't it?" His mom said for him.

Katsuki just nodded.

"What'd you do?"

He knew she was trying to get a rise out of him but he didn't even have to energy to fight back.

"I don't know what to do," he choked out.

"Come on, it's late. Get inside and get some sleep. I'll be here tomorrow when you need to talk about it."

She was right, it was late so he didn't argue. He just trudged up the stairs to his old room and fell into an exhausted, fitful sleep.

When he woke the next morning, blinking his bleary eyes as the sun seeped in through his curtain, he felt worse than he had the previous night. He'd gotten way too little sleep last night, his chest felt hollow and his throat sore.

After skipping breakfast he mindlessly made his way to the one room in the house he had always found comfort in. A room that didn't remind him only of Eijirou.

He put on his headphones and let the music wash over him as he sat at his old drum kit and picked up his sticks. He began to drum along to a familiar song, losing himself in the beat.

His fists tightened on the sticks as a new song began to play and the soft lyrics quietly left his lips as he did, echoing his heart.

I close both locks below the window
I close both blinds and turn away

His voice rose a little louder as the words became thick with his emotions. Music had always helped him feel but he wasn't sure he needed to feel more today.

Sometimes solutions aren't so simple
Sometimes goodbyes the only way

He vaguely realised he was hitting the drum a little harder than was strictly necessary but he pushed the thought aside, needing instead to concentrate on evening his breathing before the next part of the song started so his voice didn't waver.

And the sun will set for you
The sun will set for you

He squeezed his eyes shut tight to keep the tears in as he sang.

And the shadow of the day
Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you...

His voice broke over the last line and he slammed his stick down on the lip of his drum, feeling the wood splinter in his fist. He stood up and threw them against the wall, tearing off his headphones as he did and collapsed against his knees, hot, angry tears covering his cheeks.