Better than I thought

"Let's break up"

I looked at the boy in front of me.
After 2 long years, looks like all the love, time and sarcrifices I have made and given will be wasted.

Again.

I studied his face and thought that 'what went wrong?'. I love him. He told me he loves me. But why? Why am I in this situation again. Why am I hearing goodbyes.

I thought I was done and through with this. Same line, same expression, same ending.

I don't wanna go through this again.

"Why?"

So many questions in my mind but I only have the strength to ask him why.

"I just don't want this anymore."

B*llsh*t

Looks like I will start over again. Moving on from a jerk. Listening to all those crappy sad songs. Having no appettite to eat. Living in a gloomy life. Bearing all this sadness again.

Watching him leave is like a video that keeps on replaying. I have been in this situation so many times before.

I clutched my chest. Feeling if my heart's still keep on beating and working. And I stopped and realized I am hurt but why these tears are not running? Why my eyes are still dry?

I went home and started playing the same break up songs while I erase and burned our pictures and memories.

But how ironic,

I'm fine

My heart is fine

Days passed and I was expecting to be depressed but I feel fine.

I looked at the corner where we always cuddled while watching my favorite movies. Now it is just an old spot with his memories. I'm not used of him not being here, it's sad but that's just it.

Strangely, I don't miss him

It's better than I thought

I feel no regrets

Cause why would I?

I'm the one who loved the most

I'm the one who hold on

And now I feel better

So much better that I thought.