lost

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Flashbacks of you keep hitting my memory.
Sometimes it just all comes back;
and I can't stop it.
I can see it all,
right in front of my eyes:
the laughter,
the smiles,
the pain,
the cries.

I shouldn't miss you.
And I don't want to.
But I don't know if I actually do miss you at times.
Or do I just miss what I thought we were?
Do I miss what I wanted us to be?

I don't know.
I just do not know.
I'm lost.
Lost in my past,
lost in my present,
lost in my future.
Lost with you and also lost without you.

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