The Grasses Waving Above

Asphyxiation and Fear

Summary: Death. What happens? The afterlife? Reincarnation? A black wave of nothingness? Well, I would love to know, but I seem to be unable to die properly. And now I'm wandering around as a ghost. Yeah. So not cool. Especially when there happens to be a rather cute boy who can apparently see me. Would have been nice to know before I made a fool of myself. I love my life. Err, death?

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“A little learning is a dangerous thing;

Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring.”

 – Alexander Pope, An Essay on Criticism

Chapter Three: Asphyxiation and Fear

I couldn’t help it. I screamed. Loudly. Like I was being killed. Slowly and painfully. I felt like I was simultaneously having a heart attack and asphyxiating to death.

“Geez woman!” Ryan had covered his ears with his hands and was now shooting an annoyed look at me. “Ever heard of an inside voice?”I was too shocked to be angry at his condescending tone.

“You…how can you see me?” I trembled in fear. I couldn’t help it! You would to, if you had accepted that no one was ever going to see you again, and all of your square, safe assumptions had been broken in one fell swoop. That didn’t mean there wasn’t a part of me that was slightly disgusted by the cowardice I was displaying.

A sudden thought occurred to me. “Are you…an exorcist?” I asked, my voice hushed. “Or, oh wait! A demon hunter. I’m not a demon though!” I wailed. “I promise! Look! One hundred percent horn free!” I tilted my head so he could see the conspicuous lack of horns.

“You - ” he started.

“I’m not a vampire either!” I was becoming more frantic by the minute. “Mirrors…okay, well you might not be able to see me in mirrors, but…but…”

“Look - ” he tried again.

“A nature spirit maybe? Well…possibly? I don’t think I’ve sprouted wings though, and I don’t feel especially different, like I’m going to start dancing in the wind. Though I haven’t tested in I can breathe underwater…but I’m certain that I don’t have a pet unicorn that shoots up magical rainbows and - ”

 “Will you shut up?!” Ryan interrupted me, exasperated. I snapped my jaw shut, my teeth clacking together with an audible sound. “You’re one of the most troublesome ghosts I’ve had to deal with yet.”

“What?” I couldn’t believe my ears. “You mean that there are other ghosts out there? I’m not the only one?” A tiny tendril of hope was beginning to rise in me.

“What did you think you were the only one?” He snorted.

“You know, you were a lot nicer around your sister,” I remarked stupidly. And then I found myself abruptly slammed against the wall of the house, my head knocked back painfully. I struggled against the iron hold centered on my neck, my attempts to escape growing weaker and weaker as less oxygen made its way to my brain. Apparently breathing was necessary, even for ghosts.

“Don’t,” he snarled, his eyes dark, “talk about my sister or my family again. Ever.” He punctuated his last word with a firm squeeze of his hand that had my trachea closing even further. Dark spots swirled in my vision, and I was seconds away from passing out when he abruptly released me. I collapsed onto my hands and knees, coughing and gasping amazingwonderfulawesome gulps of blessed air.

“Okay,” I wheezed. “Slightly unnecessary, but I got it. No talking about…certain things,” I finished, changing my words at the last moment in remembrance of my bruised throat. “Wait! You touched me!” I said suddenly, stunned at the realization.

“I assumed that you would remember that instance far clearer than I would,” Ryan stretched his fingers, and I couldn’t help my involuntary flinch away from him. That didn’t stop me from continuing my train of thought.

“If you can touch me, does that mean I’ll be able to touch other things eventually as well?” I asked hopefully. I had visions of perhaps being able to become tangible once more, going as far to imagine having a normal life again.

“If you’re asking me if you’ll be able to become human again, the answer is no,” he told me bluntly. “Everything else though,” he crossed his arms nonchalantly, “will all depend on you.”

“What do you mean?” I didn’t dare raise my hopes again only for them to get crushed.

“The longer you stay on the living plane, the more power you gain,” he explained slowly. “Of course there’s other ways of gaining power too that are slightly more…involved.”

“Other ways?” I couldn’t resist asking him, despite the intimidating look that was on his face.

“…Don’t worry about it,” Ryan finally answered me after a long bout of hesitant silence. “You’re not the type for it anyways,” he eyed me disdainfully.

“What does that mean?!” I demanded indignantly, my annoyance skyrocketing further when I saw the smirk curling up at the edges of his lips. At least it was a step up from him choking me to…whatever would happen to me. I wasn’t keen to find out.

“Nothing,” he hummed innocently. I could imagine several uncomplimentary names to call him, but I reined in my temptation at the thought, remembering the horribly light-headed feeling of running out of air.

“You’re…face is glowing blue,” I blurted instead, shocked. Immediately, Ryan turned serious. Turning slightly at an angle so that I couldn’t see what he was doing, he kept one eye on me, while at the same time…doing something. What did he think I was going to do? Run for my life in the opposite direction at the fastest speed I could manage? Actually…that would be the logical thing to do. But, then again, he was the only person I had met who could hear and see me. Admittedly I had only been wandering around for a short while, but still. Before I could decide on what to do, Ryan had finished what he was doing, and was now turning to me expectantly.

“You’re coming with me.” He said it as a command.

“Oh yeah, thanks for the kind consideration on your part,” I told him sarcastically. “Really feeling the love here.” Now that the adrenaline that had previously been pumping through my system had faded, my fear for him had left. “Where are you even going?”

“Us,” he corrected me. “And we are going to be paying a visit to The Organization.” The two words left me with an ominous, uncomfortable feeling.

“You must be stoned if you think that I would - ” Seeing the stony look on his face, I swallowed loudly, the lump in my increasingly dry throat growing. From the smug look on his face, he heard it. I wasn’t quite brave enough to call him out on it. “When do we leave?” Okay, so I might not have been completely unafraid of him.