this is the story of my love life.

Friday January 4, 2019

okay. like hasn't talked to me since we last had sex. right after he left, he left me on open. that shit hurt.
but what hurts worse is being told that he's hanging out with a girl.
they aren't dating. she doesn't even go to our school.
but it hurts knowing that you're not the only one.
you're not the only one he talks to or has sex with.
i went to our basketball game tonight. and he plays.
it was so hard but i loved catching him staring at me and he would look away really fast. that made me to fucking happy.
but i don't know what to do.
i'm home alone tomorrow night and i kinda wanna ask him to come over.
but 3 of my friends texted him and asked if me and him have fucked. and he denied. it's like he doesn't want people knowing.
which makes me feel bad because i feel like i'm being used to be his secret little toy.
anyway i needed to let this out. i'm just sitting alone in my bed listening to depressing much and writing rants and crying.