'Gosh what a Dumbass I am' Alex thought to himself at 8:28 PM in his room in his middle class neighbourhood inbetween the hood and a big park.
He knew that he had laid a terrible path of destruction in his wake so he decided to fix the damage.
For my life to succeed I have to be as simplistic as possible and make as little differences as I need to make so that the 'formula' works
If I was lit at 10, still be lit now, lit at gcse he lit now, if I'm lit during my piano exams be lit during the real thing
And if people are ignorant of the differences you need to stop making
I pray for myself to get a thicker skin so I can ignore them
I'm smarter then them but they still get to me
And if my friends around me are intent on making as little differences in the wake of their success as possible, why am I not making a positive difference to their lives in the persuit of this goal and vice versa
Melis made such a positive difference to my life in every regard but I make a negative difference in hers? Nope I fucked up. No silly reactions or anything, I lost and I get it.
And Nicola just wanted to make a positive difference and help ourselves and she's so sweet and talented yet I still made a bad difference in her life, lord forgive me
And Yasmin, YSC, she really did try you know, on Instagram, over email, over every damn means of communication, even through making redundant Instagram accounts , I was breathing for oxygen, I always thought Yasmin was my supply, an innocent mistake, so she can be the only one to make a positive difference on me because she's my mummy Yasmin, she made such an amazing cute whole hearted reasonable difference in my life , she took it further then it had to with patience but no no I had to make a negative difference in her life
I'm the biggest dumbass in the world
I change the furnishings in my room often, I make differences that don't align with the differences I wanna make on a
Personal, Social Community, Education, Musical, Inspirational Level
There's no supply and demand for these decisions
They're useless
Im a dumbass
I need to get from X to Y and if this isn't my intent I ought to not lead the person on
I need to revolve my speech and relationships around the pure difference to be made, not failure , not the future but the empty space of potential between it
Yasmin, that empty space of potential
Anything can happen, any difference can happen on any level , but hey guess what the devil wants me to be done with my life so I opt out of this, obviously I have to make a negative difference with people like you, just obviously yas gosh
Also the YSC thing cute by Brian but I literally outclassed him on every level (idk about kynan he's like year 11 me and dank memes he''d try and make an impression with a cute smile when I'm trslit I define the roles in my relationships lmao nice try commendable but no)
Obviously I shouldn't outsource as much as possible to help myself and others with impact
Obviously I made a reckless financial decision which was outside any of my competence fields so that will have to be fixed
And yep I have to retake., make a positive academic difference to get back on the path to law school 😍
Im not open over my needs with the differences I'm making
