"Say hey, Petey-Pie.", Tony started, holding up the camera to show the teen crying. "Mr. Stark, they took my wisdom and my teeth!", Peter cried, though sounding a bit muffled by the pads in his mouth. The man started wheezing from trying to contain his laughter.
"What're you laughing at?" "N-nothing." "I's not funny! Now I'll never be as smart as you!", Peter practically shouted. Happy bit his lip, doing a better job at containing himself than Tony.
"You wanna tell the people at home what we did today?", Tony prompted nodding to the camera. "Issat goin' on Twitter?", the teen asked instead. "If you want it to.", Stark responded casually with a shrug. Rather than giving a direct answer, Peter stared into the camera and said, "Here's a very special shoutout to @thotdestroyer7645. F*CK YOU!"
Happy snickered, while Tony was more confused. Rather than wanting to get wrapped up in the drama, the man just moved on. "You wanna listen to some music?" "Yeah!", the teen cheered. The man flicked on a radio station and let the rest work itself out.
"Take me hoOooOme~
Country roOads~
To the plaaaaaaace,
I BELOOOOOOOONG!", the very tone-deaf-at-the-moment teen belted with the music, making the two men laugh more.
"As amusing as it is to see the kid high as a kite, I need to drive, so...", Happy trailed off with a chuckle, rolling up the divider. "I'll tag you in the video.", Tony responded, moving the frame back to Peter.
"You didn't answer my question. What'd we do today?", Tony asked, turning down the music a little. "C'mon, Misser Stark! You were there! I got up, took a shower—ROAD WORK AHEAD? UH, YEAH, I SURE HOPE IT DOES!", Peter paused to yell as they passed the sign, "—we had breakfast, he makes the best hash browns, by the way,", he stopped to mention, pointing at Tony to the camera. "We messed around in the lab and then you took me to the dentist!" "Uh huh, and what did the dentist do?" "They strapped me to a mask and then all of a sudden, I could hear colors!" "Yeah, they gave you the good stuff, huh?", Tony remarked, zooming in on the boy's face.
"I can see why everyone likes blue so much. It sounds like a pretty piano.", Peter said off the top of his head. "Hey, Misser Stark? Is this what being high is like? I kinda like it." Tony thought for a moment, trying to be careful about how to answer.
"No Pete, it's way worse.", Tony carefully answered. "Oh. Ok.", the teen chirped, before getting back to the music. "So go on and let the rain pour, I'll be all you need and mooooooooOOOOOOOORE BECAUSE!", he started singing again, now worthy of American Idol. Because this kid couldn't just pick one.
Tony chuckled lightly again, watching as Peter tried to dance with it. After the song ended, Parker leaned against Tony tiredly.
"Hey Dad, I'm goin to sleep. G'night.", Peter announced before falling asleep against Tony, out like a light. Tony looked down at him in surprise, before the expression changed to fondness. He turned off the camera and wrapped an arm around Peter, pulling him closer.
"Night bud."
Peter later woke up an internet star.
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Five Times Peter Parker called Tony Stark 'Dad'
Fanfiction+1 time Tony called Peter his son This stuff hits me in the honey nut feelios. I love it.
