Slowly and steadly.
Love and trust grew apart, love wouldn't tolerate the sight of trust.
But trust begged him, to respect her sentiments and value their relationship.
It doesn't matter how many guys I talk to or temporarily fall for, all that matters is that at the end of the day, its you all my mind.
He is Harry Styles. What I like from him, is his green eyes. Everyone fall in love with that eyes. He has a curly hair, and he is tall. He was nice. But, everything's changed. He started to get mad easily. I was wondering what is going on to him lately.
"I'm sorry," he said when I gave back his phone. He didn't even want to hide it anymore.
"Let's just watch the movie, okay?" I tried to focus on the movie we were watching, it was The Vow. "You know this movie was based on a true story."
"Hey, can we ple-"
"Shhh, I'm watching." Honestly, I wasn't watching at all. I tried to, but I couldn't. My mind kept thinking about what I just saw on his phone.
"You can't just pretend that it isn't happening," he said, sounded angry. I tried to ignore him by keeping your eyes on your TV. "It is happening."
I stayed silent, my eyes on the TV and I could feel that he started to get frustrated. My vision started to get blurry, all I wanted to do was go home, put my pajamas on and cry in my bedroom.
"Alright, stay silent as long as you want. Act like you don't care about this at all," he said. He got up and took a bowl of popcorn on the table, then sat back. "You never really care."
"It is you who were cheating on me and now it is all my fault?" I turned my head to him. He still sat next to me, but it felt like he's far, far away.
"Oh look, now who's talking here."
"Alright, let's talk," I tried to hold my tears. Couldn't cry right now, not here and not when I was still with him. "I know about her."
He listened.
"I know and I stayed silent until now."
"Because you don't care, right?"
"Of course I care for God's sake. I love you, Styles!" I said desperately and his eyes weren't staring at anywhere but mine. "I was afraid of losing you, that's all the matters."
"But, w-"
"I thought," I cut, "I thought what I did would make you stayed."
"But, all you did was being silent."
"Exactly," I smiled. "I gave you a permission to flirt with other girls and hope that someday when you had enough, you would stop. I didn't get tired, but you did."
Not a single word came out of his mouth.
"You got tired of me saying nothing about your love affair not because you wanted me to care as a girlfriend, but it's because you wanted to break up."
You said by being silent is an act of an ignorance, and that's what you did right now.
"We didn't have to break up," I said. "I've lost you anyway."
"Wai-" he said.
"I love you but good bye, Styles."
The time when I was afraid of losing you was the time I already lost you.
