Moonrise

↪ 1.1 | if raindrops fell like real tears

第一话："雨水如悲伤的眼泪"

( 1.1 ) ming yue

I WATCHED THE SKY AS IT FELL FROM BLUE TO HUES OF ORANGE AND PINK. The airy feel of a springtime blue gradually became warmer, a watercolor sky brushed across the early stages of the sunset.

Rays of the setting sun peer in through the glass window panes, gently touching my skin. The white walls of the classroom were tinted by the colors of the outside world, as they changed ever so slightly whilst the seconds ticked by on the clock hung high above the chalkboard.

A warm-toned white to a shade of light peach.

Those transition of colors were calm and slow, as if they were giving the bluebirds outside time to go home. The tiny, blue-feathered wings fluttered into the distance, further and further away from me. I'd like to think those wings fluttering were their way of waving goodbye. It would only make sense if I waved back in return.

Into the distance they disappeared, I watched them go.

Staring at something leaving from behind as I remained stagnant felt so odd. Everything in this world moves on but you, just like how the tree leaves were floating away with the wind to a better place than here. It was almost as if I was living vicariously, two feet against the tiled floor, sitting alone.

I should probably stop thinking about these things. Stupid thoughts don't help me anyway. 

Sometimes I can't help but wonder if the bluebirds understood human language. I guess if they did they would've definitely laughed at me.

On the other hand, maybe if I understood them, I could play songs as great as theirs.

My head kept going elsewhere while my fingers slid in between pages of my revision book, flipping gently. Pages of faded beige, my pencil stains them.

. . .

Turning my head, I looked up at the time. I wasn't surprised to see my stay had been long overdue.

I should really head home. It would be bad if I made mom worried.

I locked up the classroom as soon as I finished packing up my things. Soon enough, I found myself standing outside its doors.

It felt weird at first to look at the school hallway so vacant, so quiet, as golden lights from the sunset leak into the windows that span across these walls. The plain floor for once had shades other than grey on them. I walked, casually gazing at the shadows made on the ground by the window frames and the clouds in the sky.

These small boxes of light, they seemed like stepping stones. White canvas shoes that were partly stained in grey, they cast shadows that interrupted the harmonies of the painted sky. The hallway seemed so never-ending, yet so peaceful.

It's funny how the world is most beautiful when no one's here to see. Who knew the world was shy amidst all the chaos here.

I should stop messing around. Mom's really going to kill me.

I wore my backpack properly, picking up my pace as I hurried through the hallways and down the stairs. 3 floors are too many floors in my opinion, and I doubt that's a hot take at all.

I sped the walkways leading  up to the staff room to return the keys, then rushing to the main building soon after. But it didn't take long to feel myself slow down as I approached the entrance.

It wasn't because I was tired though. Instead it was the incoming drizzle heading all around me.

I could smell its scent, of seawater and petrichor. But now's not the time to enjoy the rain. I needed to get home as soon as possible.

The rain eventually got heavier in a matter of minutes as I walked through the hallway, making it impossible for me to get home without being completely drenched. I didn't have an umbrella with me either.

Standing under the porch, I waited for the rain to stop, or at least for it to lighten so I could go home. But I know for sure that won't happen in a span of mere seconds just from asking in my head.

Raindrops fall to the ground, into puddles; individuals that become one like every other. Some collectively hit onto the metal roof of the porch, crashing instead of softly dripping like water was supposed to. Maybe even for raindrops, our ends all turn out differently.

I wonder what would the raindrops sound like if they died happy. Silent, perhaps.

I hope I die happy, unlike those crashing above me. To die with ones I love around me, to have a life without loneliness.

What a life, or a world it is to have 'lonely' not exist. The feeling, nor the word. Things like these are so easy only to say.

Yet in the end, it is not who or what to blame for our loneliness. Not the people, the places, or the world. It's us, me; you, who are hardwired to feel lonely in times of solidarity or in the act of desertion, that steer our lives into shambles; into digging our own open graves.

My face reflected on the puddle, I watched it distort as each raindrop disrupted its stillness.

Looking at it, I wondered if God heard me thinking when the rain was drowning out the sounds of the world.

But the rain didn't drown out one thing. The sound of footsteps, wet rubber soles against the concrete floor. Squelching, it stopped near me.

Then a voice; a voice that accompanied the deafening downpour, picked up where the shoes had left off.

"Yue Yue, why are you still here?"

. . .

A U T H O R ' S N O T E

Hello hello!

I'm honestly so happy being back writing something like this. I feel like darker themes don't quite suit me, knowing that I'm a soft little shit since birth.

That aside, I've always wanted to write a book with Chinese characters. Thus this time with a given chance, I'll be fulfilling my dream. Hope you guys wouldn't mind, I only wish for you to enjoy the story as I write it. My apologies in advance if this chapter is a little underwhelming, I'll come back to edit this in the near future.

Finally, the next update is coming really really soon!

Lots of puddles,

zen.