How Long?

I stand, watching him as he runs his fingers through his hair. He has a lopsided smile on his face and his eyes flash like lightning as he spots me from across the room. I give him a tantalizing tilt of my head, a sly smile playing on my lips. The invitation is clear. We both want fun tonight and we will get it. I turn to give my friends a triumphant smile as I step out onto the dance floor.

His hands are on my hips before I can blink and his lips are against my skin. Behind my ear. Against my throat. The back of my neck.. His breath is hot, heavy, and feverish. He's biting and sucking and gasping and nibbling and absolutely ravishing me. I can smell the alcohol on his breath, but I don't care. Usually takes alcohol to get guys on the dance floor anyway. His fingers bite into my hips, marking me as his own. I gasp.

I grab his wrists, not to stop him, but to encourage him. I tell him what I want with the slight arch of my back, my parted lips, my fevered pace. He gives in, brushing his lips across my ear.

"Come home with me," he rasps, tugging my earlobe. He drags his nose along my jawline and I can't help but give into him.

"Yes," I whimper, "oh, god yes."

~~~~~~

He's late, but that's fine. He has his friends and I give him that permission to go out as he wishes without telling me where he is going. I'm not his mother. He can do what he likes. As long as I know he's safe. Hours pass without so much as a text and I worry. What if he was in accident? What if he got arrested? He wouldn't want me to know that. I was his girlfriend. Of course he is famous, but he did have a right to tell me what he was up to when he was out, didn't he?

The door clicks. I sit up, my senses on high alert. It's nearly four a.m. He steps through the door, eyes downcast on the floor. Something is wrong. He's refusing to look at me. Something is definitely wrong. He usually greets me with a smile and a kiss, but he won't even take a step towards me. I get up. My step is tentative and I flinch when he steps back.

"What happened?" I ask breathlessly.

"It was once. I didn't.... I was drunk... I- hell, it didn't mean anything," he mutters and I recoil away from him, drawing my arms to my chest defensively.

"What are you saying?" The accusation is clear in the question and I see him cringe.

"I slept with another girl tonight," the words shatter the tension around us.

~~~~~~

The hangover is heavy in my head. Her anger is something I know to expect, but the hatred in her eyes is like a dagger in the heart. It was just once, I think desperately, and then she fell to her knees before me and then I lost all train of thought. I throw my hands into my hair. I let things get out of hand. I shouldn't have gone to that club. I know it is foolish. I do dumb things when I'm drunk.

"How..." she starts, her voice cracking. I look up at her and I see her dark eyes harden as we lock eyes, "why?" she demands. Her face is like steel and I know I've lost her. At least for now. She never hates me for long.

"I was drunk, baby, honestly," I step towards her and she doesn't move away from me this time. I don't push another step. I know if I do too much at a time she'll only pull into herself, "she looked so much like you..." I trailed off and I saw her features soften slightly. She was going to give in. Forgive me this one time. It only needed to be once. I would never do it again. She knows this. She knows me. Her little sigh of acceptance is all I need to hear.

"I.... If it was once, I can... I can forgive this. Just please, don't do it again," her voice shatters at the end. I catch it and I feel the ache in my chest grow. I was given this beautiful creature. I needed to cherish her. I take my final steps toward her and I capture her lips in a kiss. In my jean pocket, Calina's number burns against my thigh.