The enemy

An unusual experience

I gave the old lady my hand to help her take the big step that you need to take when you want to enter a train. I wasn't the one experiencing any problems, but I could see that the lady struggled a lot with trying to say the expected " thank you sir "after I had helped her with carrying both her luggage and her Heavy large oversized jacket up the train.

The lady didn't seem to be able to say the Three simple Words and I just ignored her. This left me feeling a Little bit helpless and I also felt embarassed because those two simple jobs felt like I had just been working out.

As I walked past the old lady trying to find free seats, I couldn't help but realise that every single soul sitting on this train must have been having an extremely harsh and exhausiting day. Usually I do not give my attention to such small and unnecessary things, but this time I couldn't help but realize that the train looked so used and old. The smell of mold and dust made me feel uncomfortable and disgusted.

No, sorry. I really don't use to tell lies but this is ( as you probably already have been realizing ) a really sensitive theme to me. I actually pay a lot attention to small things, small things that annoy me and make me crazy. I am diagnosed with obsessions and there is nothing worse for we than Dirty and rotten Environments like these! I just can't deal with dirt, kitchen tools like knifes but the worst of all my fears are snakes.

To not make myself to stressed and anxious about my own stupid thoughts I loosen up my tie a Little bit to make it easier for myself to Breathe in the necessary but stinking air.
I slowly look around myself to find anything positive with the environment which I'm finding myself in, suddenly I can't stop myself from jumping in the air.
The old lady is sitting right in front of me. I never saw her coming?
But there she sits. Right in front of me with a thick book in her hand, her eyes wide open, as if they were looking for something special.
I slowly raise my left hand and smash it hard on my face.

" Stop dreaming! Stop over thinking! "
After a few minutes the train starts moving and a few seconds later children and grand parents fall into a deep sleep. The old lady in front of me still looks with eyes wide open into her book.
I must admit that it doesn't look normal.
Who does read with such an exitement?

Hours pass by. Suddenly there are only thirty minutes left until we enter Los Angeles.
And then I discover something unusual, every single person that I can see in here is sleeping except for me and the old lady.
As the thought hits my brain the lady puts her book away, we immediatly get each others eye contact. With her fragile and very ugly set of hands she smoothly opens her bag taking out a set of glasses.
- Glasses which she apparently didn't need while reading -

I cross over my legs, pretending that I'm busy with something even though I might look extremely guilty. But I am already her victim, slowly she observes me from top till toe.
" Why aren't you sleeping, my dear? " It's a dark Voice sounding like she had been smoking tons of cigarettes earlier in her life.
I uncomfortably open my mouth forming the words " Why should I? "
A few moments later I realise that this must have sounded naughty and rude. But then I decide that I am completely right, why should I be sleeping?

But the old lady doesn't move a muscle in her face. She is completely cold.
" You know, I don't like it when people talk to me in a bossy way, I am an old lady. I have been driving my car all day just to get to the railway station, and now a Young snooty man like you annoy me with your existens? "
I blink twice, did I really just hear her saying those words? Even though my face belongs to my body I have extreme difficulties to imagine how it looks at this moment.

Before I can say anything she suddenly opens her mouth widely, a terrifying and loud noise is coming out of it. The noise is disturbing and doesn't sound like coming from this world.
I stop breathing, to horrified to act or do anything. She moves her hands up to her face and takes a hard, close grip on the two sides of her mouth. She is now literally ripping her mouth up, making it big and bright.

The sight is horrifying and a tiny little tone, sounding like the " peep " of a mouse leaves my body. The sound now turns into the sound of a snake, steam moves up out of her mouth.
Thick smoke is starting to fill the room, it feels impossible to breathe.
" Somebody help! I am hallucinating! " It's a helpless choking noise.
The smoke settles itself in my lungs and on my skin, it's wet and I feel like I start molding.

I look at my hand, now screaming like someone had been pressing a knife through my lungs. A white substance reminding me of glue starts protruding out of a small wound on my hand. The white liquid spreads itself over the whole hand, surrounding it.
A gurgling noise leaves my mouth as I try to scream. I am not a human anymore, I start to become a monster. The liquid moves from the hand up my arm, finally landing on my chest. It's warm, thick and heavy. I am helpless.
I see that the white color is turning green-blue. It is taking the shape of mold. Instead of getting paralysed I come up with the idea that I probably should try to take my clothes off to stop the mold from continuing to grow all over my body, and as soon as the idea is planting itself in my head I rip my tie up and start to take off my jacket too. But the mold is faster.

There is no way to get out of this. My eyes suddenly land on the old lady again. A bright grin splits her head into two pieces, she is watching me die. My choking screams are still filling the train compartment. I can't understand why nobody wakes up? What a terrible way to die I think for myself. But I can't give up now!
„ Believe in yourself, think, think!!! „ I tell myself.

With all my strength I raise myself up and stumble over to the lady, but honestly I can't call her woman anymore, it or she is a monster. With a clenched fist I smash her face, it's all her fault. But I'm not going to die today, not today.
I can't hold myself from continuing to punch her right in the face, after a while I don not even know what I'm doing. The punching gets harder and everything seems to happen in slow motion. And then I can't move anymore, I work hardly to at least get some air into my lungs.
Suddenly I fall down, I can't describe the feeling, because I never fell. It just felt like I did. Everything feels possible and I move my head up which lays on a smooth kind of fabric.
As I move my head I look the old lady right in the eyes, she cries and screams.

„ Rape!! Rape!!! „ I hurry myself up and see that I have been laying on her lap. I observe my body, the substance is gone. People around me look at me and point at my chest, my jacket isn't covering my body anymore. I am half naked!
Staff and security run from all different directions, a tall man grabs me by my hair.
„ What were you trying to do huh? „ He screams at me. Slowly with shaking hands I point at the old lady. „ S-s-she... „ But the words don't want to be said. I can't say them.
„ Oh you little piece of shit!!! How cowardly can a person be? A grown up man trying to get into a old lady's pants? „ The man looks me right into the eyes. Only one question continues to echoe in my mind. What did just happen?
Everything looks like usually. But it was so real? „ Excuse me I don't know what went into my head, I seriously don't know. „

„ Oh that's what they all say at the end, if this happens again and I read in the newspapers that you did something like this, I will visit you in your nightmares and ensure that you end up behind bars! „ I slowly move my hand up and down to show that I have understood.
The staff leaves the train compartment and a few minutes later the train enters Los Angeles.
With trembling steps I leave the train station.