It's been a month and I still don't have a job. Classic right, I can't keep a job down. I won't even tell anyone about it this time, I'm tired of complaining about my life and I'm pretty sure people are tired of hearing it. I can't stress mama she's just found her happiness and I won't be the reason she is unhappy again. Bryce on the other hand worries too much and he tries to save me but right now I just want to deal with it all on my own. Matter of fact it doesn't even bother me that much, I used to cry over things like this before now I just don't let it get to me. It actually came as a surprise to me how unaffected I was on losing my job. Not necessarily unaffected but it didn't stress me as much as the last ones. I came back to my hometown where I grew up in hopes that life would turn out better. Applied for jobs at familiar places that I used to hang around but after a few days I was told I could no longer work there with reasons that are not straightforward. I've tried the library and the coffee shop I visited all the time when I was younger but in all of them I couldn't keep a job for longer than two days. Now I won't even bother to look for it because there's no point. The only other place I could get a job is my brothers firm. I can't possibly get fired because he has more than 50 percent shares in his firm so the last word is his. It's quiet a big company but I don't really know where I'd fit in since they are mostly architects and landscape architects they don't have interior.
I did the one thing I always promised myself to not do. It's not all that bad but I guess it really hurts my pride to do it. I have an account that my brother opened for me when I started high school. Mamma used it to put in money for me to use eventually my brother took over my allowance. I used it all through college but when I started working I stopped using it completely and vowed to never use it again, I tried to give it back but my brother refused to take it back and mamma said I should keep it and if I never wanted to use the money then I should just leave the card in the safe. I also have an account my so called father set up for me, he has been putting money for me since he left, my mother never touched it for obvious reasons and I never touched it either. I never knew about the money at first, why would he think I'd take his money. Come to think of it he'd put in a more than good enough amount of money to take care of me and it increased when I started college but I have never touched it, it just made me hate the man even more. So it's not necessarily that I'm broke but it's my pride and hunger for independence that has me in this situation. Recently I used some money in the account my brother set up for me which was obviously a bad and a good Idea. Good because I didn't have to change anything else in our lives just that I don't have a job.Maria still comes as usual and Skylar still attends daycare and everything is okay. Bad because now it has reflected to my brother that I used it so he knows something is up, bad because I realised my brother is still depositing a hefty amount of money in that account even though Im not using it. I have no idea why since he knows that my so called 'father' is also depositing a hefty amount like he always did.
When I think about it I realise that Mamma never had a good enough job to give us what we had yet we went to private schools and through university with no financial problems. We didn't live in a fancy house or ate fancy food or anything like that, we weren't spoiled or got everything we wanted but we got really good education. All in all we got everything we needed and not always what we wanted. This all leads to one question? Did my father pay for our education then? Which means mama must have paid for everything else. I don't know If I want to know anything about that so I won't even enquire even though I badly need answers.
I hear the door bell ring and wonder who could be there since my list of visitors is so limited and Maria is not supposed to come in today, Skylar is also sleeping in her room. It could be the landlord or maintenance but I wasn't told anything about anyone coming in so who could it be?
Well I won't get answers questioning myself and there's only one way to know by answering the door. When I open it I am half shocked to see the person at the door and I don't do anything to hide my shock. He however is staring at me like he is expecting me to invite him in. He has got to be dreaming if he thinks I'll let him in here, after everything that's happened there's no way. I'm not one to hold grudges but I'm not about to let this one go.
"What do you want?" My tamper went from the bottom to out of space in just seconds, the shock vanished just as quick.
"Ahhh can we talk?" he says as he runs a hand through his hair.
"No we can't" I have a lot of questions running through my mind regarding what he could possibly want to talk about.
"Please it's important" I stare at him trying to figure out what to do. To be honest I really want to hear what he's got to say but I'm not sure if I want to let him inside the house. I mean Skylar is sleeping in the other room and I don't want him to see her because If he does he will know and if he knows he will go and tell him and the idiot will take my baby away from me. But then again the idiot has already seen her and denied her flat out and this man right here never believed me when I told him the first time.
"Talk" I say this as I close the door behind me and we speak outside.
"Is it possible to speak inside?" The audacity to ask to be in my personal space. I give him the 'oh hell no' face and scoff. I mean who does he think he is?
"Okay can we speak somewhere more private than the hallway" he requests
"And why would I do that" I ask him
"Look I know you don't like me much but there's something important that I think we need to discuss alright after that I'll be out of your hair.
After contemplating I decide to let him in my apartment and pray to God Skylar doesn't wake. Seeing that he came all the way here to tell me whatever he wants to to tell me it must be very important. When he sits on the couch he looks around the place and admires it. Damn right I'm an interior designer it's got to look good.
"Speak" I say with an attitude I should never have around my daughter because I don't want her to have my bad habits.
"I know..I know you have a daughter with my brother and I just wanted to set things straight. I know, I know he denied her and everything but I know it's his just like you have been saying all along. I just wish I would have believed you in the first place, it's just we all thought that you wanted to take money from the family and well I mean it's been done before and we were just being cautious. You were only with my brother for a year before he asked you to marry him".
Some part of me understands where he is coming from but I refuse to just let it go like that. I was treated like crap because of poeple's insecurities. Adrianno denied our baby before it was born, even now he still denies her and after that altercation at Mr Reed's office I highly doubt he wants anything to do with her. Wait a minute, how does Micheal know that she is really his if his brother doesn't believe it. This makes me really curious because even he swore that my daughter could not be his brother's. With the uncanny resemblance Skylar has with her father I'm surprised Adriano didn't notice it but then again the man hates me he wouldn't recognise a dog as a dog as long as it was mine.
"So what do you want from me"
"Let me take her with me, I think it'll be harder for him deny her if she is in front of him.
"No" he must be dreaming if he thinks I'll let my daughter go with him
"Chan-"
"No, for all I know you will take my daughter and not bring her back, what do you want with my daughter really??"
"I just want to prove that it's his, this time he will believe it."
" Didn't your 'dearly beloved' brother tell you he already met her and still didn't believe, matter of fact he dropped her on the ground when he realised she was mine.
"I know what he did was wrong, he was angry"
I can give him that, he was very angry but I'll never forgive him for dropping my daughter to the cold hard floor.
"What makes you so sure, why the sudden interest in my daughter after all these years?. Look I'm more than capable of taking care of my baby all on my own and I'll keep doing it even when she starts school, graduate from university, till she walks down the isle and even after that till the end of me all on my own. We are just fine!! "
A wise someone once told me that when you open yourself up to fear or any sort of inferiority people feel like they have dominion and anything they say, one feels the need to obey and drop your sense of boldness.
