*this story is 100% true
I was skiing in the Swiss alps one day with my pet iguana Harry when Harry had to burp and caused an avalanche. There was tons of snow racing down the mountain toward us and we knew we couldn't make it to the bottom in time so we hid in a laundry basket I always keep in my wallet just in case. We hunkered down and let the snow cover us up to our surprise there was a midget that got trapped in the laundry basket with us and he told us his name was Sherman. Well, Harry and I both knew that the only way to survive was to... Pull it our bags of ramen noodles and cook them on the stove inside the laundry basket. We finished our food and then decided it was getting really stuffy so we took Sherman and put him out for the vicious snow ponies to eat him alive. Harry and I both looked at each other and knew this would be the perfect time to go hang out in the jacuzzi so we had an awesome time that week. Best time of my life actually in that laundry basket with my pet lizard. Alas the time was to come to an end when we both had to go home. Harry and I climbed back up to the surface and looked around and saw to our horror that everything was colored magenta and there were space aliens walkin' around everywhere. I found myself waving at them shouting "Howdy ya'll what's poppin?" Each of them turned around and started singing the Myanmar cat song while dancing in a circle and shooting rainbows from their eyes' and the next thing Harry and I knew we woke up in our birthday suits in a long hallway with a tiny light at the end. Harry and I got up and started walking down the hallway and then out of the blue we heard a voice whispering "He who sleeps gets the baby." We made it to the end of the hallway and there was just a grey door about half the size of me, so I crouched down and opened the door and what I saw amazed me. I saw sitting there an American girl doll holding a bazooka pointed right at my face and she said in the same voice as I heard earlier "He who sleeps gets the baby." She pulled the trigger and I flew back right into this sofa and now I'm tellin chu this story
