Monochrome Heart | Peter Parker [Rewritten]

Red

"Morning" The clerk lady said to Y/n.

"Morning" Y/n smiled, placing down her book- cover first so it would be easier to scan.

"Just this?" The clerk lady, Isabel, asked with the book in hand. They've known each other for years, being an old friend of her parents led to Isabel now being Y/n's legal guardian after years of struggle between her parents. Isabel had noticed Y/n had seemed a lot gloomier than usual but she thought it was normal but still worried at the back of her head.

"Hey Kid, would you like a hot chocolate?" Isabel asked with a tight smile, pointing behind her where her drink preparing items were. Y/n knew that Isabel had been talking about some new imported chocolate and how 'exotic' it would taste. Although Y/n doesn't enjoy hot drinks as much anymore, she was willing to drink one last time for Isabel, to see her smile at someone else enjoying her creation.

As Isabel prepared her drink, Y/n decided to pick out a single table at the corner of the register, she liked being alone while she read and enjoyed the feel of a small space to herself. Watching the cars go by, she wondered, 'is the shine to cars a different color than their base color? Would a 'red' car have some 'blue' shine? After all, Isabel said cars have a tiny sparkle like glitter to them when you look at them up-close'.

She was snapped out her thought when Isabel placed down her cup. With a smile on her face, Isabel placed a hand on Y/n's head momentarily, she still saw her as the small kid who was hopeful for her future. Knowing things were different now she hoped Y/n knew that she was loved. Isabel wasn't an idiot, she knew what a depressed teen looked like. Growing up, she witnessed her brother go through it first hand, as well as, unfortunately, finding his body when he decided to 'end it'.

Y/n smiled tightly, not knowing how to feel about this grand act of kindness. She watched Isabel urgently scurry away as another customer needed her. She felt melancholy about the fact that she probably wouldn't be able to experience Isabel boast about a new ingredient or a new shipment of books anymore. But she, Y/n, knew that living life and trying to enjoy it while everything looked bleak and pointless was not something she wanted to do.

She hated seeing the world but atleast she could see it. She has enjoyed small things that the world had given her until now.

Oh what she would give to pet another cat with a missing eye.
-

"Morning" Y/n said as she passed by her neighbors through the building halls. It was still amazing to her to see so many people walk out  of their homes, ready for the day. She was always fascinated with how life worked, but envied the people who lived it.

The sunlight hit her skin as she opens the door to the rooftop of the building, she smiled sadly at the sunny day and felt tears threaten to spill. It wasn't a brightly sunny day, it was mostly cloudy with glimpses of the sun here and there. She loved this kind of weather.

She came upon the edge and looked down at the city and the how high up she was. She was scared of heights, 'Ironic isn't it?' She thought for a second. At this moment she started having second thoughts-

'Is this really what I want to do?'

'What if there's cure tomorrow?'

'What if Dad comes back?'

'What about the school trip next week? I paid for that, would they give it back?'

She slapped her hands into her face, realizing how much she probably didn't want to do this. She knew she didn't want to partly end it but how couldn't she? She doesn't have many friends, her parents are gone, she hasn't been in school these past couple of days, and, for Christs sake, she can't even see color. 'The world is a bleak meaningless place that with all the modern technology there is nowadays I can't even see the color red!' She thought.