..Because You're Worth It [Draco/Newt]

Chapter Fourteen - Alone

25th December 1911

Christmas had arrived at Hogwarts and students who had stayed had woken early in their common rooms to oceans of presents by the ends of their beds and the fireplaces within the common rooms. The Gryffindors were excited to rip open the wrapping paper, the Slytherins were excited to see who got the better gift, the Ravenclaws were hopefully to receive parcels of letters, books and writing material while the Hufflepuffs were more excited to give gifts than receive them. Christmas was the most favorited holidays in Hogwarts by both student and staff, especially when the students got to go home to see their families.

Students such as Blaise Zabini had left to their families, leaving only a few groups of students behind with their professors to celebrate the holiday. One of those students was Newt. He had decided he wasn't going to go home this holiday, instead staying to take care of a baby raven he had found. He knew his brother wouldn't be too fond of this, but he was sure his mother would be just fine, as she knew how important care of a baby animal - or any animal - is.

He was awfully involved in caring for the raven, and found himself incredibly happy when the bird would nip at his finger lovingly when he was holding it in his hand. He found comfort in taking care of the creatures he had and adored each and every one of them. He also liked them much more than people. People were confusing, and they sometimes did more harm than good. Especially recently with the people in his life; they've caused more harm than good.

John hadn't spoken to Newt after their kiss and Draco hadn't even looked at him as he went to leave Hogwarts for Malfoy Manor to spend Christmas with his parents, mostly just his mom, though. He hadn't even waved goodbye, just walked out of the castle with a bag in hand. Needless to say, Newt was hurt. Draco was judging him, he knew. He could tell that maybe, Draco agreed with everyone else - homosexuality was a sin, and Newt knew how disgusting Draco must see him.

Then again, Newt wasn't sure if he was indeed gay. He had felt something for Leta, just a little, but whether it was admiration or a 'crush' as he had heard people say, he didn't know. But he always found himself looking at boys. In class, on the Quiddich pitch, the Great Hall, and his favorite place - the courtyard. John had been the first boy who he befriended that seemed to feel how Newt did - to feel an attraction towards boys. Towards the same gender as himself, and he seemed perfectly comfortable with it. However, Newt was not comfortable with who he was. He had never been.

And maybe that was why he had a harder time than others when it came to socializing, along with other things. But maybe, it was also Newt's irrational fear of being hated by everyone. Not that he often cared, but if he liked someone and wanted to be there friend, there was always fear that the person in question didn't like him.

But now here he sat in a secluded part of the castle, only the professors and few students staying behind while most other students were already gone with their families pondering on the thoughts of his self. But he decided to ponder no longer and wander about the castle instead, as the baby raven was sleeping happily in its nest. So, Newt took his bag and stood quietly, tip-toeing down the stairs that led up to the secluded area. He made his way down silent and empty corridors, navigating his way through open doors and out to the courtyard where the snow was blanketing the ground. He sat at the frozen water fountain, bringing the collar of his coat.

He watched the snow fall to the ground, sticking with ease. The snowflakes falling attached themselves to his coat, leaving little wet dots on his sleeves. The snow clung to his hair, the white specks decorating his curls as though they were hair pieces. It was silent, nothing but the slight breeze and Newt's breath to be heard. He sat there alone for a while, his mind clear of any troubling thoughts as he watched the snowflakes fly around in the winter air.

But someone was approaching him, now. Someone short, with long black hair and a smile on their face. It was Envy Peterson. Of course, she'd stay. She joined Newt silently, brushing some of the snow off the fountain before she sat beside him. He regarded her with a slight nod, to which she smiled in return.

It was quiet between them. Envy hadn't said a thing and Newt hadn't either. It was almost as though there was nothing to say. Nothing to mention.. nothing to talk about.

Until-

"I heard what happened at the Yule Ball." Envy whispered. Newt's head whipped around so fast, the snow that had been clinging to his curls simply vanished.

"What?" He croaked.

"I heard," she repeated. "About John."

Newt sat with his mouth agape, eyes beginning to water.

"Don't get upset, Newt, please." Envy said, her hand raising slightly as though she was going to rest it upon Newt's shoulder, but she didn't. Instead, it fell back to her lap to which she looked down at. "I'm not going to judge you."

"Whatever you heard-" Newt began, but his voice was shaky and breaking apart.

"It is true." Envy interrupted, looking back at him. "Malfoy doesn't get upset about things, you know. But you - you're different. You make him feel things differently."

"How- how did you know he was upset?" Newt asked in a hushed tone.

"I saw him, here." She replied, patting the fountain. "He was sniffling, wiping his eyes.. Newt, I'm not going to tell anyone."

Newt could only stare at her.

"I won't tell anyone." Envy assured. "I would never do that to you, or John, or anyone else for that matter. I understand how hard it must be."

"You don't.." Newt frowned.

"Okay, maybe I do not. But I can try, can't I? I will not judge you for something I myself don't understand. Newt, if this is who you are, then that is okay."

Newt hadn't realized at the start, but he had begun to cry. He could feel the tears running down his cheek, warm compared to the snow. Envy smiled at him, emphatically.

"You're my friend, Newt." She said. "I just want to see you happy."

Newt sniffled, bringing a gloved hand up to wipe his eyes quickly. He looked at Envy, sniffling again as he mustered up an unsure smile. She smiled warmly in return.

Maybe, just maybe, not everyone was so close-minded as Newt thought.