Growing Up

Chapter 2

I started to put things away. Bread, milk, peanut butter, cereal.

I suddenly heard a crash from my mother's room. My eyes go wide and my adrenaline starts pumping as I drop everything and race to her room and push through the door.

"Mom! Mom! What was that?" She was still sitting safely in her bed, but there were so many tears that her face was drenched.

Looking around the room, I found that there was glass broken all over the floor, and a big dent in the wall where she threw her cup.

She was on the verge of collapsing in a huge heap, and there is nothing I can do about it, so I go collect the broom and dust pan from the closet and sweep the clear shards of glass onto it and dump it in the bin when I'm done.

I gave a huge sigh and I drop oh her bed.

"Mum, why won't you speak to me?" She meets me with her usual blank stare.

"I know that Harry left. I know that dad died. I know that you just want it to be done. I know you want it to be over, but I'm still here. I'm not leaving you. I know that it's hard. I get that you want to feel something other than pain, but maybe if you would just speak to me. If you would just tell me what you need, we can talk, figure out a way to get to you to feel better. You're killing yourself mum. You need help, and you aren't letting me in. I can't do anything for you right now. Not when you can't even say hello to me. You are hurting more than yourself mum. Please stop barring yourself up all alone in your thoughts. Nothing comes from that except pain. Please. Just please say something to me. Anything." I beg her, desperation made clear in my voice.

The air was filled with a stiff silence, and eventually I gave up. Just like I did when Harry left. I let dad take care of that one. I gave up just like I did when dad died. I gave up just like I did when mum officially stopped talking to me. I gave up, and I keep giving up because I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know how to help her. I don't know what I can do except sit here and watch her slowly killing herself putting herself through as much torcher as she can.

I push the hair off of her damp cheek and place it gently behind her ear.

"I do love you mum. I just don't know what to do anymore. I miss you. Please come back to me." I kiss her on the forehead and I walk out of the bedroom with my own set of tears in my eyes.

I walk slowly out into the living room and onto the couch. I sat down, brought my knees up to my chest, and grabbed the pillow next to me, putting it on my knees, so that my crying wouldn't be heard by her.

 I don't remember falling asleep, but I found myself waking up on my stiff, and uncomfortable couch. I sat up with a crick in my neck, and I knew that my back was going to hurt later.

I stood up and stepped quietly across the carpet and slowly open my mother’s door.

She laid on her bed, eyes closed, and breathing even.

I glanced at the clock that sat on the table next to the bed.

It read that it currently six forty-five. I cannot believe that I let myself sleep for that long!

Making sure that she was soundly asleep, I walked back out and went back to turn on the television.

Surfing through the channels, I found something that caught my eye.

It was my brother. Harry. This is exactly why I rarely watch T.V. or go on the internet other than my lessons. I always found that my "brother'' and his band were always in the news.

I don't know why, but I stopped.  I never stopped on channels that had anything to do with him.

At this point I barely consider him my family anymore. Family doesn't abandon one another. Family doesn't leave without a goodbye. Family comes back to visit. Family goes to their own fathers funerals!

Harry is not my family.

"And here we are with World famous boyband One Direction!'' The host said in a peppy voice. I couldn't help but notice that Harry looked so much different than he did before he left. He had tattoos, longer, less curly hair, he had pushed it back in a new style, and he had tighter pants, but he did look happy.

"So boys, what do you think about the reaction to your newest album Midnight Memories?"

"Well, I think that it’s amazing. Just like the other albums, we hoped, but never predicted that the fans would like it this much." Said Niall.

I'm not going to lie. I did figure out their names, in the beginning when I still had hope that he'd come home. That he had forgotten to say goodbye and was just too busy to call or something.

So yes, I know their names, and yes. I have heard their song "What Makes You Beautiful."

By the time that their full album came out though, I had given up all that hope that Harry would come back. I accepted that Harry wasn't going to come back.

"Yea, the reaction to the album was absolutely fantastic. I think that this will be the biggest album yet." Zayn commented.

"Well I personally love it! Do each of you have a favorite song off of the album?"

"Umm My favourite would be Midnight Memories, Louis told the woman.

"Mine is Happily" Niall said.

"I like Through the Dark." That was Liam.

"Yea, I like that one too." Zayn.

"I like Don't Forget Where You Belong." That belonged to Harry.

I almost burst out laughing at that. That's rich! That's all he did was forget where he belonged. He forgot about us and he left.