The sun shown through my blinds, reflecting off the gorgeous white snow. The soft blankets burying me, fighting the cold outside of them.
'Ah, Valentine's day' I thought to myself. I threw my legs over the edge of the bed and smiled to myself, the day I go to see my love. Rising to my feet, they met with the cold wood floor, waking me up more. I slowly swayed my way to the kitchen and began to make some breakfast for my long journey ahead. I reminisced about the memories with Donghun, my love. I'm so happy to go see him. I miss him. I enjoyed my breakfast. Then proceeded to scrape together the small amount of money to buy Donghun a gift. I put on warm clothes to fight the cold weather.
Unfortunately for me, I did not own a car, and had a fear of getting into taxis, so I was stuck walking to the coffee shop, the florist, and to Donghun. I walked out the door, locking it behind me. Feeling the cold envelope me. I got dizzy due to the sudden change of temperature. I began to walk. The wind violently pushed the snow into my face, but I held my strength.
I reached the coffee shop and hurried inside, walking to the front counter to order a hot drink to warm myself. I sat by the window with my coffee staring out as the sun reflected it's bright light off the snow. I smiled, wondering how the boys were doing today. They've all been well, but since Donghun went away I've missed him a lot. Before I knew it my cup was empty and I stood from my seat to go continue my journey to see my love.
I walked out of the shop and felt the cold take over once more. I continued a few blocks down to the florist, a lovely elder lady who always knew what flowers would be best. I walked in and she politely smiled at me.
"Ahh! Yuchan, how are you doing love?" Her smile was bright and the shop was warm and humid to preserve the flowers that laid in rows in front of me.
"I'm doing well Ms., you look lovely today, what flowers do you recommend for Donghun today? Although they won't last long in this weather." I smiled at her.
"Oh! I know the perfect bouquet of flowers for him, I made it earlier, let me go get it my dear!" She ran off into the back, she sure did love flowers. As I waited I looked among the beautiful flowers that lied before me, assorted in many colors. The beautiful roses, tulips, lilies, and all the colors. The smell of flowers made me feel happy. I walked up to the roses, Donghun's favorite.
The little old lady brought back a bouquet of flowers so beautiful I almost expected it to be more than I could afford. The most beautiful set of purple roses and lilies.
"How much? It has to be more than I could afford."
"How much do you have?" I pulled out the ₩20,000 and showed her.
"₩20,000 it is. Anything else is on me."
"Really, thank you so much." I kindly bowed to her. Thankful for the help she provided.
"Now go see your love! He'll be happy to see you." I ran from the shop outside, hyper from the encouragement of the elder. As soon as I got out the door I was instantly reminded of the harsh wind and snow blowing through my face. I slowed down just a little. After an hour my legs began to ache and the flowers were hidden under my coat to protect them from the strong wind. My hands were in my pockets, desperate to be warm, but I kept on to see my love. For him. I want to give him my all, I'd do anything to see him again. His smile always warmed my heart, and his eyes always shined the brightest, we were harshly judged for our relationship but it never stopped us. We love each other. Forever and always, even in death. I smiled to myself, only 30 minutes to go.
As I continued to push forward to see him. I felt as if I was going to cry but I know my tears would freeze onto my cheeks if I did. The things I do for this man. I miss his warm touch, especially in this cold. He'll always bring a smile to my face. I never wanted him to go, but he had too. I still make time to visit him, always. The other guys didn't bother much to do so, but I'd always make time for my Hunnie. I just wish he didn't have to be so far away. The walking is starting to hurt more and more. Hopefully next time I'll have the courage to take a cab. I miss my walks with him, they were always so peaceful. Holding his hand was so nice. I buried my face into his hoodie which resided under the thick coat that separated me, and Donghun's flowers from the cold outside. The smell of his cologne and the flowers gave me motivation to push on more. Just a few more minutes.
As I arrived and walked up to Donghun I greeted him and began to speak.
"It's so cold out, I hope you're staying warm. The boys and I have been fine. Sehyoon and Byeongkwan have announced their engagement, I'm happy for them. I wish they'd make time to come visit like I do. How are you?"
No response.
"I miss you a lot," a single tear began to fall from my eye. "It's not the same without you, since you left the bed is so cold, the world seems black and white to me. Forever and Always though, even in death, my love. Even if it's not the same without you."
I laid the flowers on the headstone that resided with the name of my lover engraved on the top. I began to sob quietly over the grave that held my Donghun captive. I thought back to the day he left. We had an argument and that was the last I saw him before I received the call on that hot summer night. My lover had left me, for good.
You couldn't possibly know how this feels.
