I'm The Badass, I Don't Need You

Chapter One: The 'Im-Going-To-Kill-You' Face

Author's Note:

Okay, first thing's first, COVER COMPETITION XD

Will you design a cover for this story??? Pwetty pwease :3

Must be able to be the cover photo, will get a dedication in the soon-to-be chapter what ever number it is when I choose the WINNER XD

Second, how is my little Poptarts????

Hope you are all well, well, that was it I think.... yeah, that was it, n-less you want to know how I had to wash all the windows in my school building??? No? Okay then :L I SEE HOW IT IS D,:

STORY TIME XD

~Caitlin

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I bit the side of my mouth as I tried not to laugh as I finished my work of art with the spray can of paint on the side of the fish and chip shop.

I like it, it looks awesome! I chuckled and finished the fish fighting an shark with a fencing sword in colourful clothes fighting a llama riding a unicorn in a top hat.   I finished and stepped back and inspected my wonderful piece of art.

I burst out laughing and threw my board down on the ground and counted down "Four, three, two, one-" "Hey! You! Stop!" "Right on time Jeremy!" I yelled and started to ride down the alley, to get away from Jeremy.   "Annie! Stop it! Come back here before I have to cuff you!" I laughed and looked over my shoulder "Nice try my good man!" I came out of the end of the alley with Jeremy close on my tail.

I flipped my board up and jumped over a bench and landed safely on the ground. I kicked the ground so I could go faster "Annie! Stop!" I smiled and adjusted my cap "No thanks Jeremy, that's no fun!" and with that I left poor obese Jeremy behind, he should lay off those dougnut's.   It was a good five minutes until I heard police sirens, really boys? Really? This didn't even beat the record!

I laughed as I got chased my cop cars and weaved in and out of old couples and teens cheering me on, not so much the old people though.   I went through the park and was laughing so hard, I had tear's coming out of my eyes. My backpack on my back felt weightless as I came out of the park entrance wiping my eyes because I couldn't see.

I looked just in time to see me about to collide into some random "Hey! Move!" I yelled but it was to late, I collided with the man of steel and my board rocketed out from under neath me to the other side of the street.   I fell back, with the idiot landing on top of me.

The sirens got louder and I shoved him off me. I stood and dusted my black ripped jeans off and offered the curly-haired boy in a grey beanie. He took my hand and I pulled him up "Sorry I gotta go, nice meetin ya, you curly haired chap!" I said in a VERY posh accent and ran to get my board. I ran and stamped on it and caught it. The sirens are just around the corner.

Oh gawd, I'm gonna get caught!... Again! I swiftly jumped back on my board and took off.   "Annie, pull over!" Oh shiz, they got the mega phone! I want one! Okay everyone! Calm the fuck down! Nah, who am I kidding! I rode over to the stunned guy in the beanie and zipped past him "Cya!" I yelled and went back into the park. I smirked, I'm gonna get away with it! All of a sudden I was boxed in, Damn! I'm not even in the park yet!

I smirked and jumped off my board and stamped on it and bowed "Wow! Refreshing! Took you guy's long enough!" I laughed as Brian came out shaking his head "Annie, I don't get it. You didn't do this stuff when 'HE' was around, why now?" I narrowed my eyes "Cause I can, got a problem with that?" I snarled.   "Yeah, I do actually" I sighed and held out my hands "Hurry up and arrest me, I got thing's to do" He shook his head and cuffed me. He took my bag and skate board "Hey! Watch out for the board! Took me months to get that!" I yelled as he threw it into the front seat.

The other cops started leaving, but said 'Hi Annie!' or 'Almost babe' 'Maybe next time?', we're like a family. I do this on a daily basis.   Brian grabbed my wrist's and shoved me towards the car "Hey! Watch out for the merchandise!" I yelled, I noticed a crowd around us. Five boy's in beanies and sunnies watched in shock, pftt. Tourist's. Probably here to see the great and glorious home town of the Louis Tomlinson.

 "Annie, seriously? Every time" Brian joked "Hey, you gotta love me" he chuckled and tried to shoved me into the back of his car "Psst, Brian" "Yeah?" he whispered, we've gone all secretive spy's now "Wanna give the tourists at two o'clock a show?" he smirked, we never really did this. Only about a hand full of times before. But since he's like the sheriff he can "Yeah!" "Okay let's go!" I whispered excitedly.

  I stood up straight span around and kicked him in the gut "YOU'LL NEVER GET ME ALIVE!" I screeched and broke out of the hand cuff's I was working on the with a hair clip. I jumped onto the bonnet of the car and ran onto the roof of the car and started to do a shuffle "YOU CAN'T TOUCH THIS! DO DO DO DO DO DO DO DO! YOU CAN'T TOUCH THIS! MY, MY, MY MUSIC HITS ME SO HARD. MAKES ME SAY 'OH MY LORD' THANK YOU FOR BLESSING ME. WITH A MIND TO RHYTHM AND TWO HYPE FEET!" I started fake singing (technically you can call it yelling) MC Hammer's, You can't touch this.  

The tourist watched in horror, haha. While everyone from town laughed and cheered me on as I slid down the end of the car as Brian jumped to get me "Get back here!" he yelled "Never! You fat munchkin eater!" I yelled in happiness as I ran behind the five tourist's and into the surrounding crowd.

I grabbed onto the dark skinned boy in a choking hold and pulled him away from the ground and whispered into his ear "Play along" I felt him nod sightly as I pulled him away "NO BODY MOVE! OR THIS GIR-GUY WILL GET A KNIFE TO THE THROAT!" I screeched like a crazy.

I pulled out my phone and covered it with my hand, so they think it's a knife but it's just my cheap ass mobile.   Everyone froze, the tourist's looking at me in more horror. Brian stepped cautiously towards me, secretly winking at me "Now, now. No time for being rash"

"Your saying something about my mother?! You bloody doughnut eater!" I screamed. The dark haired boy started to laugh but covered it up as a coughing fit "Z!" yelled blonde friend in a desperate Irish accent, sweet! We got an leprechaun!   Then, my mobile had to ruin it by playing it's ring tone:

 "Long live the reckless and the brave
I don't think I want to be saved
My song has not been sung
So long live us

Looking out at a town called Suburbia
Everybody's just fighting to fit in
Little rats running mazes, having babies
It's a vicious little world that we live in

Looking back at a life on the other side
I realize that I didn't fit in
Didn't hate it, but I didn't quite relate it
To my precious little world.

[Chorus]
So long live the reckless and the brave
I don't think I want to be saved
My song has not been sung

And long live the fast times, so come what may.
I don't think I'll ever be saved-"   I pressed the green button and put the phone to my ear "Yellow?" I answered as I looked at the tourist's shocked faces.

Brian started approaching me, while yelling at me "OI! ZIP IT SKIPPY! I'M TRYING TO TALK ON THE PHONE! JEEZE! RUDE MUCH?!" I yelled at Brian as he tried his hardest to not to laugh "I'll have to call you back, love" I pressed the end button and whistled awkwardly.

I let the guy go and straightened his beanie for him and winked "Thanks hun, you should be an actor" I said politely and I stepped away from him and his queer grin, freaky dude.   I took a bow and straightened "SEE YA SUCKER'S!" I smirked and bolted for it.

But Brian was quick and grabbed me by the neck and dragged me to his car as I yelled at him "YOU RED ASSED BABOON! I'LL SELL YOU TO THE CIRCUS! I AM GOING TO EAT YOUR DOUGHNUTS YOU FAT MAN!" he shoved my front onto the bonnet of the car and put my hands behind my back and re-cuffed them again.   "THE BRITISH ARE COMING, THE BRITISH ARE COMING!" I screamed, stealing the line from the muppet's "Your a speacial one, aren't you Annie?" Brian chuckled.

I shrugged "I try"   I sighed "Can't we be a bit more civilized about this?" I questioned "No" he smirked at me and shoved my into the car, the crowd laughing at our display of affection (While im trying to beat the crap out of Brian).   I pouted of the window and saw the five tourist'sand blew the kisses and I waved poshly at them.

Then Brian took off.  

Yay! Time for a couple hour's in  the cell, thinking abut what I did wrong... yay for me. Please note the sarcasm.