Dear Scarlet...

Tuesday - January 29 - 2019

Dear Scarlet...

Today was a surprisingly good day! I didn't think a day without Mel, Ian and Kelly good be such a good one! Let me tell you what happened.

I woke up, did my normal morning routine and turned on my tablet to play some games, because I had a lot of free time. When it was five minutes before eight, I saw some messeges from Mel.

Yesterday, she had told me she was sick before sleeping. She had a low fever, so I didn't think anything of it. I thought that if she had a low fever, she would still come to school, because today, we would go to church the first two hours and cut a pie in our class the sixth hour. Turns out, the fever had risen.

At first, I didn't understand that she wouldn't be coming to school. So I called her. She picked up and her voice sounded like she had been smoking for thirty years. The minute I heard her, I knew she wouldn't come.

I thought that I would spend the day with Kelly, Kay and Ian. Those are the only friends in my class that I'm comfortable enough talking to. More specifically, starting a conversation with. So I didn't worry.

When I went outside, I didn't sprint to school. I had no reason to. Mel usually came early, she was the only reason I came early. But today, I did a good five minute walk before really going to school.

I stayed with some girls and waited for Kelly. Naomi ( the only friend from elementary I'm really close with ) came and we hang out. I was still looking around for Kelly, but I didn't pay that much attention to the thought of her being there. I'm not saying it in a bad way, it just shows how close I am with Naomi. It means I didn't feel lonely.

But when Ann showed up, Kelly was no longer a second thought. Ann always showed up the latest. So that's when I thought that Kelly wasn't coming today.

The bell rung and we went to class so we could see who is present and who is absent. Kay handled the writing while I checked everyones presence. And, like expected, Kelly wasn't there either. Nor Ian.

I thought it wasn't going to be a good day. I thought that in the best case scenario, it would be boring.

But then I hung out with Ann and Ellie. Ellie was one of my close friends from the other classes. We reached the church. We went to the second floor, and we talked for the entire ceremony. We weren't the only ones, everyone talked, to the point where teachers were splitting up groups. But they never got around to us.

You might be asking why we were talking so much. Personally, I was just trying to cheer up the girls. Ann isn't christian. She comes from Albania, and I'm not saying that people from Albania can't be christian, but she came from a town where they didn't do that.

Ellie on the other hand, despises churches. She always cries when she is in them. Someone who doesn't know her would say she is disrespectful, but that couldn't be further from the truth. Her dad died when she was really little, and churches always remind her of him. She didn't cry though, so I say mission accomplished!

When we went to school, we still had four hours. They passed by surprisingly fast. I had fun in the class, even though Mel, Ian and Kelly were absent.

Then came the hour I was dreading. Cutting the pie. I thought I wouldn't have anyone to hang out with. Sure, Kay was there, but I didn't feel comfortable hanging out with just him. The reason is a little weird for some people, and it's weird for me to say it to you.

Growing up, I saw a lot of friendships break for stupid reasons. Most of them being for boys. It just seems so ridiculous to me how a friendship can break because of someone. But when I began crushing on Ian, I kinda understood it. So I set this barrier on my best friends crushes. We are friends, but I don't like talking to him alone. It just feels like I'm betraying her. I'm not saying I am, I'm just saying it feels weird doing it because I have taught myself not to.

This is the first time I have told someone of it without fear. You are a great friend Scarlet, even though you can't comment on what I'm saying to you because... Well, you are a book.

So when Christa ( the person who sits next to me ) was going to sit with her friends, I asked her if I could come. She said yes and I sat with her other two girl friends. It was fun, being able to joke around with someone who wasn't Kelly or Mel. It taught me that I'm closer to my class than I thought I was.

I went home and talked two hours straight with Mel. I told her about the day, and some small hints Kay threw that he was missing her! She, of course, fangirled and proceeded to make me deaf! I was wearing headphones! RIP my ears!

I learned that Kelly and Ian had the same thing she had. I wasn't surprised, I think their younger siblings may have something to do with it.

Then I went to the choir I go to every Tuesday, Thurday and Saturday. I was sitting with two guys and they were making awful jokes, so I just said the classic "Close the freezer please!". They just died of laughter and it was really nice.

I don't like talking about my after school things, so that's why I never go into detail about them. I don't really know why I have this complex, but I don't think about it.

Over all, it was a really nice day, and I wouldn't change anything about it!

Love,
Crystalia.