I'm a nobody, always have been. I hide in the corners of rooms, I don't talk to people I don't know unless I have no choice. I'm not a party girl, I prefer to stay home where I feel safe, where my books and my computer are. On the odd occasion that I am dragged out by friends or family, I find a spot out of the way, where no one will notice me, and I watch. I watch everyone else having fun, laughing and joking, singing and dancing. They all seem so perfect like life is their friend and is on their side. I see my friends half forget that I'm there in order to flirt with others at the party, and in one case, leave with a chap, only remembering that I exist a few days later. I love my friends and I'm happy for them when things work out but I can't help feel that twinge of jealousy, that feeling of why can't this happen to me? Directly after I feel regret and guilt, they are my friends I shouldn't feel that way about them. I can't help but think that sometimes I should just leave; that they would be better off without me, without a killjoy constantly by their side. However, at the end of the day, I love them and I know that they love me back, and we share too many memories, and for that, I will always be thankful.
