Christmas In New York

New Beginnings

Once we reach the Empire State building, nervous Josh comes back. We both stand at the entrance and look up.

"You know, maybe I should start with something smaller? Something with just three or four stories? You have no idea how many structural mistakes there could be in that building."

I squeeze his hand, "Oh no you don't. Don't go calculating all the ways this could go wrong!"

He flashes me a guilty smile that highly resembles a grimace.

I pivot, trying a new tactic.

"You know my mom used to have a board in her classroom saying, 'There is no top. There are always further heights to reach.'"

We turn to each other at the same time and, just like on the plane and at the Times Square, I can see him gathering courage from my words. After a long pause, he nods once.

"Good thing I wore my walking shoes."

And then we start to walk, up to the 102nd floor, following crowds of people for a solid hour and do not let go of each other's hand throughout the way.

After eleven breaks, we finally reach the destination, huffing and panting.

When we reach the door that leads to the upper deck, he hesitates.

"You can do this Josh. One step out of this door and your mission will be complete"

His whole body is shaking, but he is the one who opens the door. And he's the one who leads us outside.

We find an opening at the edge of the rooftop and walk towards it.

And then there we are, gazing down at one of the best cities in the world. It's mesmerizing.

I close my eyes and feels the air blow through my hair. I feel free and open my eyes hoping that Josh does too.

He is staring at the view below us in wonder, his awe-filled eyes meet mine and roam around my face again, warming me inside.

"Beautiful."

I don't know what he is talking about, the view or me, but at that moment I don't care. It could be both or it could be either.

We enjoy the view for a few more minutes, and then I remember something my dad used to say.

"One of the greatest a man makes is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do"

"Another quote from your parents?"

"Yeah. My dad."

"They seem like amazing people."

My heart stutters. But it is there, in my chest.

And just like Josh was able to face his fears, I know that I can talk about my parents. Because I'm with him. This is Josh.

"They were. They were amazing people."

Josh stills. I can feel him watching me. "I'm sorry. What hap..."

"Actually, I don't want to talk about it, " and just like that, my courage fails me.

Luckily, Josh drops the subject.

A half an hour later, we make our way back down to street level. We're quite the entire way down. Across the street, I spy a bakery.

Forcing a smile on my face, I say, "How about a sweet to celebrate your victory? For completing all the three phases."

"Amy..."

Continuing to feign cheerfulness, I interrupt him, "Oh look! They have cannolis. Didn't you say they were your favourite?"

He blows out a breath and nods, accepting that I don't want to talk about it.

I'm hanging by a thread as it is and am relieved that he doesn't push it. I don't think that I can stomach a conversation about my parent right now. It would certainly shred me to pieces.

We walk into the bakery and I see it, a sign for the rum cake saying, "Christmas Rum cake. Just like mom used to make it."

I suck in a deep breath as images flash through my head.

"What's wrong?" Josh asks worriedly, looking all over for any injuries of any sorts.

The emotions I have been holding in all day rush up to my throat. I let out a sob so loud, everyone turns to me at once.

My hand slaps over my mouth and I run out of the shop, ignoring Josh's calls for me.

I can't stop. My head is buzzing and my world is closing in from all sides.

"Amy! Stop running!" I hear Josh and stop short. Putting my head in my hands, I cry my eyes out.

I cry over the unfairness of it all.

I cry because this is my first Christmas without them.

I cry because I flew halfway across the country like a crazy person, completely alone.

But then I feel Josh's arms around me and I know I'm not alone. He's rubbing my back, whispering soothing words.

I sniffle and burrow into his arms. It feels so good to be held.

"My mom and I used to bake rum cake every Christmas." I feel him tighten his hold on me.

"I miss them. God, I miss them so much."

"What happened?" He asks softly, laying a tender kiss on the top of my head.

"They got into a car accident three months ago. They didn't make it." Josh holds me even tighter and strokes my back as I tell him about that night and the three months that followed, and how I ended up in New York.

By the end of the story, I feel so much lighter. Lighter than I have been since their deaths. It's almost like I am at the top of the Empire State building again. Free.

The feeling is just impossible.

I look into Josh's eyes, knowing he helped me get here, to this point of acceptance.

"Thank you, Josh, for today. I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't met you." I say and Josh bends down to come at the same level before speaking.

"I feel the same way about you, Amy. You were my angel today and made one of the scariest days of my life bright.

He looks deep in my eyes and I realize how close we are. I think he notices it too because his arms twitch around me.

I can't stop looking at him.

He can't stop looking at me.

And I wonder if he's going to kiss me, here in New York, in the middle of the loud, bustling sidewalk.

His hand come up to cup the back of my head and he starts to lean forward. My heart thunders in my chest.

Slowly and softly, I press his lips on mine and it feels as if two pieces of a beautiful puzzle fall together.

Third Person's POV

Meanwhile, a woman races down the block because she is late for a meeting.

Who makes their employees work on Christmas anyway?

Her mood couldn't have been worse. She is glaring at everyone and anyone who gets in her way.

Just as she is about to cross the street, she stops them. A young couple entwined together and gazing at each other in adoration.

The girl runs her hands through the guy's hair, bringing his lips down to hers.

They share a passionate kiss and the woman stops. She has never witnessed something so all-consuming and intimate in her life.

A few minutes later she crosses the street and before she enters her building, she puts her hand out, catching the first airy flakes of snow in her palms.

She smiles and enters the building, her heart too feeling light.