I'm honestly not sure where to start. People say this is good for you..this whole "closure" thing. Getting it all off your chest, but. I don't really know man. I have so much to say and everyone only wants to hear the good stuff. They want easy answers, the "I'm okay. How are you?"
But. That's not me. I like being brutally honest. If someone asks how I am. I'm not going to lie. I hate small talk, and everyone tries it with me. Like they completely forgot who I was. And now Mrs. Frayner sent me here.
I don't know what they want me to tell you, miss shrink lady, Kevin was my best friend and I didn't even know he was going through so much. But I can tell you, he doesn't like small talk either. Well, didn't. He wanted to know everything. He was smart and spiritual and perfect and deep. I loved him with all my heart. He's probably shaking his head at the fact that I'm sitting in an uncomfortable chair talking to a shrink. But it's a grade, and Kevin was always on my ass about grades.
Look ma'am. I'm done here. Obviously suicide is a big deal. But it's my big deal. I have to deal with the fact that my best friend no longer wanted to live. None of your cliches are gonna help. I'm broken. Completely. But I'll heal in my time. Bentonville High School will not force me to be okay, in a week or ever. My life was little pieces of paper, ya see. Right in front of a fan, and now the fan is on. And all the little pieces of paper are every where and lost and some are broken. You can't fix it. Nobody can. I had a thousand memories and took advantage of them. I was under the impression there would be a thousand more.
You asked me if I could say anything to Kevin, what I would say. Nothing. I'd only want an hour, sitting with my best friend in a burger King.
And now I'm done
