"Life is a series of encounters and farewells. I believe we grow in the process.
For now, it is very sad but we will meet again. We can hope for that day to come soon, and we will be able to greet each other with a much
BIGGER WELCOME."
"its funny how people reach out for help when they needed it...but what kills us more than anything is being ignored and given the title of an 'attention seeker' ."
.......
"even a bright candle shining and glowing in the eerie darkness eventually gives up when the darkness is too much and all the candle can do is melt its life away."
.......
Morning came to soon and the sun was already spreading its glimmer. My eyes opened and my limbs were already shaking off the laziness. Something felt heavy on my back. Aurora. Sleeping like a baby.
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The more I move the more it snuggles into me. I wondered who owned such a beautiful cat. I looked at the badge and was surprised by the words carved on it.
Shine bright
Glow bright
Even if its the darkest blue night
Just like my Aurora.
my eyes betrayed me. Tears rolled down even when i tried to control them. My heart ached so much reading those words. A train of memories rolled down as if i'm experiencing it all over again. His face was stuck in my eyes. him saying the words. The last words he said to me before...be..ffore he left for a place where no one can ever return...where i cant even reach out...The feeling of being worthless and useless returned. I couldn't lend a hand before neither can i now. He asked for help but no one reached out to him.
My throat keeps contracting at the thought of him. My mind went blank...my limbs gave up and my lungs demanded more air. And I knew it struck me again. The fifth panic attack in a span of a week. The tears automatically flowed out...the muscles ached and breathing became too hard. i suffocated in my own body. I wanted to get of this mess too but everyone turned their back on me. "Should i follow you too? I feel like a burden and so useless for everyone. Please take me with you??!!"
The attack slowly died down but the storm in me didn't. These attacks always took my mind to the dark side of me. I lied on the cold floor as my limbs gained its consciousness but my mind switched off all the emotions. Except sadness. "Do you feel it? Like I do...do you see where am falling? In the endless pit of darkness. Do you?"
