Someone who goes through a traumatic experience may heal physically, but it takes a lot more than rest and bandages to heal yourself mentally. It takes time, love, and support to heal mentally. If you even heal at all. Van Taylor's thought she would...
I wake up in a sweat. I rub my face and feel tears under my eyes. I'm not really surprised, I have the same nightmare almost every night. Yet it still scares the living daylights out of me. It feels so real. I lay in bed for a minute, and just think about things.
After a while I get up, and get in the shower. I stay in there a little longer than necessary, but I have to get things off my mind. When I get out I go to my closet and decide on a green crop-top, and white shorts.
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I dry my hair and put it up in a messy bun. After I do my makeup, and decide to pair my outfit with a gold necklace. I walk downstairs and Ashley is still asleep. I don't know exactly what time it is, I just know its after six-thirty. I walk over to her and gently shake her shoulder. Her eyes flutter open and i see they are swollen and puffy from crying so much.
"Are you going to school?" I ask her quietly. She shakes her head and sits up.
"No, I don't think so. I think I'm just going to drive you to school then go home."
I nod in approval and then give her a hug. I go upstairs to get my shoes out of the closet. I decide to wear a pair of white vans. I grab my hoodie then head downstairs. My dad is up and is currently in the kitchen.
"When was the last time you ate?" He asks, turning so he can look at me.
To be honest I don't know when the last I ate was, so I respond with "I don't know" He walks up to me, and I know this is going to turn into a very deep conversation. Lord help me.
"Listen to me Van, this anorexia seems to be coming back." I look away, trying not to meet his gaze. I had anorexia about a year ago. My dad sent me to a camp in Anderson, Indiana.
"You may not know what this did to you, but I do. It took my daughter from me, and I just got her back. I hated to see what it did to you. I hated to see the bones popping out of your skin, it hurt me. It made me feel like I was a bad father. I don't want to lose you like I did...... Like I did her." He says, his voice breaking slightly. I hate seeing my dad like this.
"Dad you not going to lose me, and your not a bad father. Your the best father anyone could ask for. I'm okay, I promise" He doesn't say anything he just nods. I don't know what to do to make him calm down. Then an idea pops in my head, but I don't like it.
"Here, look."I say. I go in the kitchen and grab a banana.
"I'll take it with me to school." I tell him. I really want to make my dad happy, but I just cant seem to eat anything.
I go and kiss him on the cheek, then go outside to wait for Ashley. I open the door to the passenger seat and plop down. I take my phone out of my pocket and check my Instagram. I see in my notifications that eight people commented on my recent post. I don't want to click it because it might be hate, but it also might not be. There's really a fifty fifty chance. I let the stubborn side take over and i click the heart.
