Misfortune

Aashi Juhi King

Everything always going wrong in my life... I don't think I ever felt happiness what I thought was happiness was just a lust it wasn't real I was straight played.

All I wanted is for somebody to love me... But no love lies here with mayhem and pain all around I'll never find love here. My own mama didn't love me she gave me up on me when I was Ten years old after she fell in love with a drug.

To be truthful she really gave up on me when I was four years old. My daddy being a war veteran came back with PTSD drowning his pain in liquor me and mama felt how he really felt once the bottle was empty and he could no longer numb his pain. Daddy used to beat me until my light skin was black, blue and purple.

It'll be ninety degrees outside and I'll be the only kid outside with jeans and a long sleeve on to hide the bruises and to keep child protective services away. One day I passed out I was ten seconds away from having a heat stroke when Ms. Jewel brought me in her cold house because she had a air conditioner in each part of the house since she didn't have central air. In the places that didn't have a door to keep the cold air in it was sheets hanging up.

Sitting me on ice after I cooled down and woke back up Ms. Jewel fixed me a hot plate of collard greens, mac and cheese, cornbread, and some buttermilk deep fried chicken. I loved coming to Ms.Jewel house she the only person I felt genuine love with. Since Daddy only allowed me and mama to eat Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and Sunday I came down to Ms.Jewel house to get my daily meals. Since Daddy left every morning for work at five.

I was down at Ms.Jewels at seven in the morning she sent me to school everyday with a full stomach. We lived in a apartment, a two flat our two bedroom apartment at the top and Ms.Jewel stayed downstairs.

With the walls being thin as hell I'm sure everybody on our block heard what was going in our house. I always wondered why mama stayed with Daddy after the constant abuse, cheating, starving us and any other pain he caused. She always used to say "Your Daddy going to get help baby then we gone be a happy family again" that was bullshit the abuse got worse and worse as the days went on. Daddy getting into it was some niggas on the End was his worst mistake. After watching us for two weeks they finally decided to run in our house.

Since they saw me always going into Ms. Jewel house they figured she was my grandma and shot and killed her too. Lucky me and mama wasn't at home we was out grocery shopping when all this went down. Daddy was there all by himself when the robbery invasion and murder took place.

I was sad and happy all at the same time. I was sad as hell at the fact Ms.Jewel ended up dead behind my alcoholic ass daddy. Ms. Jewel was the only person who was there for me. I was happy that daddy was dead, I thought mama would've been happy too now that we didn't have to worry about getting our ass beat nomore.

Mama took his death hard after a year of him being gone we was sleeping in daddy old cadillac that he left behind. Instead of working to provide for us Mama started selling her pussy.

After three months of sleeping in the car mama was beyond strung out on drugs. She went from selling her pussy to put food in our mouths to selling her pussy for her next high. Mama finally decided to drop me off at her brother house.

Uncle Ray took me in with no problem he worked six days a week just to provide for us. So the love I needed to fill the void I felt from my neglecting parents Uncle Ray wasn't enough.

Although he took me on dates, brought me a nice outfit with a matching pair of kicks, buying me jewelry Uncle Ray treated me like a princess it's just sad I never listened to the speeches he gave me because now looking back at some of the things I can remember from them he was telling me some real ass shit.