What Hurts the Most

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I looked at my reflection in the mirror and shrugged. I had always been so confident in my looks, but now I wasn't so sure. I stopped wearing makeup, I stopped doing my hair. I didn't even bother with clothes anymore. I simply pulled out the first thing I found in my closet and put it on. I was wearing a plain black t-shirt and some faded skinny jeans. I grabbed some flip flops and slipped them on. My long, straight, black hair was down and my green eyes looked I bit puffy from crying myself to sleep last night.

I used to be the most popular girl at my school. My life was once a perfect littl fairytale but then my mom died... she was my best friend, my everything. After mom died my father became a shell of the man he once was. He's so depressed he doesn't even bother getting out of bed most days. He's also taken up drinking to the point he can't see or walk straight anymore. My mom and dad were once high school sweethearts, they were madly in love even after almost 24 years of marriage. They used to act like they were still in the honey moon stages of their relationship.

My little brother and sister on the other hand didn't seem to understand. I think there still too young to completely understand what happened. All they know is that mom is no longer with us and she's in a better place. They know she's never coming back but she will always be looking down on them. They still ask for her from time to time and it breaks my heart every time I have to explain to them that she's never coming back. Sometimes they ask if she left because she doesn't love them. That's the part that hurts me the most. I always have to explain to them that mommy loved us all very much and if she had a choice she would still be here but she was forced to leave us. They just nod and say 'okay'.

I'm all they have left now. At the tender age of 18 I am forced to raise twin 5 year olds on my own. I was supposed to be going off to college and having fun. These were supposed to be the best years of my life. But instead I'm stuck in Hamilton, Pennsylvania raising my brother and sister. I decided to put off college for now so I can work to support my siblings. My dream was always to go off to school in New York.

I love my brother and sister don't get me wrong, but I just wish everything wasn't falling on me. I didn't plan for my life to turn out this way. Now I can only hope to be able to go to school somewhere nearby. That's probably not going to happen anytime soon though.

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I shook my head trying to clear it before going down stairs to make breakfast. I made scrambled eggs, bacon, and pancakes. I grabbed a few cups and poured us some orange juice. "Mikey, Katie, breakfast is ready!" I yelled up the stairs. A few minutes later I hear them running down the stairs. They walked into the kitchen already dressed for school. They each took a seat on either side of me and said, "Good morning Ali." Then they proceeded to eat their breakfast.

Once we all finished our breakfast I quickly did the dishes. I grabbed a clean plate and piled on some food for my dad. I grabbed a mug and poured him some freshly brewed coffee. I made my way up the stairs and to my father's door. I lightly knocked on the door and awaited a response. When no response came I knocked again, this time with more force. After a few minutes of waiting I cracked the door open and peered inside. The room was littered with empty beer bottles scattered around the room. I sighed and made a mental note to clean those up later in the day. My dad was sprawled out on his bed drool coming out of his mouth whilst he still had a beer in his hand. His once handsome face was now scruffy with his facial hair. His hair which he once kept short was now long and disheveled, sticking up in different directions. He had on the same pajamas he had worn for the past 3 days.

I scrunch my nose up as I walked closer to him. A putrid smell coming off of him. He really needs a shower, I thought. I tried to nudge him awake but no matter what I did he wouldn't wake up. He stirred a bit in his sleep but that was it. Seeing as I was running out of time and had to go I decided to just leave his breakfast on his nightstand. I hope he notices it's there and eats when he wakes up. It broke my heart to see him this way. He was once a happy, vibrant man. There was never a time I had seen him mad or even sad. He was an ideal father to me and I can only hope that someday he will pull himself together again and be an ideal father for my siblings as well. With a resigned sigh I wiped a stray tear off my cheek, just now realizing it was there.

I made my way to my room and grabbed my purse and my keys. I went downstairs and into the living room. "Are you guys ready? We don't want to be late for school, do we?" I asked.

They simultaneously looked up from the TV and said, "We're ready." And Mikey grabbed the remote off of the coffee table and switched off the TV. They both made their way over to me and together we walked through the front door and out of the house. With the click of a bottom I unlocked the car doors. I took their book bags and threw them onto the passenger seat. Then I quickly opened the back door and let Katie hop onto her booster seat. I waited as she situated herself and buckled her in tightly. When I was done I walked over to the other side of the car to find that Mikey had already gotten into his booster seat and buckled himself up.

"I'm a big boy Ali, see I did it all by myself!" he exclaimed.

I smiled at him and said, "Good job baby, I'm so proud of you. But you know I still have to check to make sure your safe. He pouted at me as I checked that his seat belt was on properly. I gave it a quick tug to tighten it a bit and congratulated him on a job well done. "You're perfectly safe now, and you did it all by yourself. You're such a big boy Mikey." He gave me a proud smile and nodded in agreement. I quickly shut the door and got into the driver's seat. I turned the key, bringing the ignition to life and carefully backed out of the drive way. I drove them to school and brought them to their class. I gave them each a kissed and waved goodbye to them. "I'll come and pick you up when school is over, be good." I told them in my stern, motherly voice.

**********

When I got to work it was 9:00am. As soon as I walked in and noticed how busy it already was I quickly made my way to the back of the diner. I went to my locker and shoved my purse in. Then I grabbed my apron and slid it over my head. I took my name tag and pinned it on my left breast; I put my notepad and pen in the apron pocket and tied my hair up in a quick pony tail. I made my way to the kitchen and washed my hands. As I washed my hands Jane walked up to me and said, "Oh thank goodness you're here. It's been super busy this morning. You have section B." I smiled and nodded then went to take my orders.

Around 10:00am it started to slow down a bit. This happened every day we would get really busy in the mornings and then have a few hours of peace. Then around 11:30 or 12:00 it would pick back up again for the lunch crowd.

I walked over and gave my last customer the bill and smiled. Then I walked to the bar and helped Holly clean up. After I was done helping her I went back to my last table and took the black folder back from the customers. They smiled and told me to keep the change. I smiled back and said, "Thank you, have a nice day!" I quickly put the folder containing the money in my apron pocket and began to clear the table. I went to the back and into the kitchen and dropped of the dirty plates. Then I made my way to the register and put the money in, taking the change and stuffing it into my pocket. I put the black folder back in its place and sat on a stool by the bar.

I was sitting for all of 5 minutes before I notice a man being lead to my section by the hostess. I put a smile on my face as I reached the man at the table. I handed him a menu and said "Hello, my name is Alison and I'll be your server today. Would you like to start with a drink?" He looked up at me and our eyes immediately met. My whole body was lit on fire just by the look in his beautiful blue eyes. I was pulled into a daze, I felt like I was dreaming. Then a low growl escaped his lips breaking me from my haze. It was a sound I had never heard come from a human. And with that he uttered a single word that confused the hell out of me. Little did I know the word would change my life completely.

"MATE!"

**So I hope you liked the first chapter. Please let me know what you think.

Good? Bad? I would really love to get some feedback. J**

*Storyteller414*