runaways [ lams ]

04 | loathing & loving

(a/n) i changed the chapter names. also i figured out that listening to panic! at the disco helps me write this
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"I hate this," Alex groaned, burying his face in John's shoulder. The two of them sat in the backseat of the car Alex was pretty sure was stolen. His head was pounding and his vision was pounding. He couldn't believe that he was now a criminal, with driving while impaired and underaged drinking.

John chuckled, rubbing his back. "You'll be alright. It's just a little hangover."

"Not just that. I mean all of this." Alex pulled away to look at him straight in the eyes. He bit his lip, glancing down at his hands before back up at John. "I want to go home."

"But then who will I spend the rest of my life with?" He protested, grabbing Alex's hand. "Please don't leave me."

"Listen, John. You're an amazing person, but you're a terrible influence. I was a perfect law abiding citizen before I met you. Now look at me!" Alex pointed at his messy hair. "I haven't brushed my hair or changed my clothes since Sunday! I miss Eliza, and even if it means my heart breaking every second of every day, I want to see her. She's still my best friend."

John looked down, chewing the inside of his cheek. Alexander was his only friend now, and he couldn't lose that to a girl who'd just hurt him. He had a strong connection with Alex, and surely it wasn't one sided. He wouldn't have stayed with a murderer if he didn't somewhat enjoy his company, so why was he leaving? The life they were living now was better than whatever Alex had a week ago.

"Alex, please-"

"What I want you to do is drive me home. School starts in two hours, and I want to be there for it. Please, John. If you want, I can visit you on the weekends. You're still my friend, and probably the only reason I haven't been kidnapped or turned to prostitution."

John looked away. "Fine. I'll take you home, but I'm picking you up after school, okay? I don't want to never see you again."

"You'd do that?" Alex smiled, squeezing John's hand. "I don't think I'm ready to face my parents, so that would be great."

"Why not?" John shrugged, glancing out the window. He hated that Alex was leaving so soon. He really, really thought that he was more to Alex than just a source of protection. It crushed his heart.

"Thank you so much." Alex smiled at him, wrapping his arms around him. "For everything, really. You've been such an amazing and caring friend, and wow. I never thought I'd say that about someone who killed people."

John closed his eyes, hugging the shorter boy back. He absolutely despised how torn up he was getting over this. Couldn't he just have one nice thing without it being taken from him? Alex was the only person he wanted to be around right now. Besides, wasn't John the one who helped him get through Eliza turning him down?

He crawled into the front seat, starting the car. He noticed his subtle frown in the rear view mirror, which somehow made him more upset. Instead of letting himself dwell on the moment, he slammed his foot onto the pedal and drove towards the place he and Alexander had initially met. In front of the old and rundown bakery.

Alex gazed out the window, wondering how everything would play out. What would Eliza say? Would she reveal her true feelings, or would it go back to normal? He wouldn't be totally distraught if they forgot about the whole situation, but he was really praying for the first option. He'd much rather end up with a girlfriend than a bestie.

He snapped out of his trance when the car came to a sudden stop. Alex stepped out of the car, thanking John for the ride, then headed off towards his house. He knew damn well he'd have to be stealthy, since he didn't want to face his parents just yet. He just needed to get in, grab some clothes and cologne, and catch the bus. It was probably easier said than done, but he didn't care. Worse case scenario, he could use being late to school as an excuse to get out of a lecture.