Everything I kept Inside

Your presence brought me immeasurable amounts of joy.

Infatuation part 1.

i still reminisce about the happy moments we experienced. recalling the memories as if I'm actively reliving them jumping throughout each scene with a smile joined with laughter.

This memory is about a girl and a boy whose names I can't recall.

a promising young lady and a dashing young boy that sit next to each other in a seemingly comfortable classroom as yellow hue glides over their wide grins caused by the sun. they speak silent sentences amongst each other words only they can hear. the utter amusement on their faces is comical. it's unknown to me what the two children are so giddy about, but they seem to be quite invested in the matter. as the boy erupts in laughter the girl only watches with a fond smile.

she does this on various occasions. in fact the girl seems to smile much more around the boy. to assume the cause of her shy grins are because of him would not be a lie. she smiles when he's not looking, and when he texts her outside of the school day, but she smiles the most at home. you see, her house was a place she could not rest and to rid her insomnia she kept herself busy with thoughts of the boy.

she thought he was a rather friendly boy although a little rough around the edges. she thought their friendship was powerful and sweet. she thought he was the only thing she needed in her insignificant life. she thought he would make it all better. but as the days go by she realizes it's simply infatuation and dependency quite the opposite of what she thought it was.

he constantly hurt her in so many ways, yet she still smiled through as if nothing was wrong. the vibrant colors that once flowed vigilantly through the scenes slowly mold into a hazy monochromatic portrait. the things that once made her smile now make her cry at night. and the friendship she once longed for now rots at the bottom of her heart along with the feelings she poured so much of her heart into.

i stop reminiscing only to wipe the warm tears that begin to slide down my cheek and feel the nausea burn in my gut. what a tragedy those children are kindling.