Whisky tango, chocolate cake

Have a biscuit

I have reasons to believe that our souls and human bodies can cross any boundaries..
No matter what kind of this limit(less) ..
If is just the Pain ,Stupidity or maybe euphoric pleasure ,or "just" the cruel Torture..Call them however you want. Are all just boundaries,different dimensions,and you can choose to do it yourself,to just jump,or..to be pushed from behind..ouch..
But I cross them, falling from an euphoric sky,into a low level of hell.Just been pushed,with a brutal, cruel force,and I had to accept my decline.
But.. it wasn't only one boundary that I cross in my fall,I cross most of all,except the Confusion.
Anger..Frustration ?. What the .. pff..I try to pass them all,with grace..
Hah! can a fallen angel be more proud then I am?..
Now,somehow I'm still stuck in this dark confusion,and realised that I might need more training to jump, because at the moment I'm in a endless loop! so.. I have to "live" more in order to learn more??.. Fuck!
.. but how,and why..Why is this nasty door so hard to open..
I know I can do it,my cursed energy soul can do it, after all is just a door... Might only take more time..yeah..
Wait.!..what ?? Time? Time!!
The boundary called Time,is forming that loop..forcing you to reborn.. eww..
I can't cross it,damn,no matter how much my soul cries out or try. I want to open this confusing door,to see some light behind again, but.. hmm, you know what.. fuck it.. I'm up to fight or beg to stop this fucking endless loop now !..to stop this " kick of my energy " ..Yes.!
I want to be ERASED !.. in faaaact.. I fucking demand it !!..😡 😟..."Shut down my soul light..oh, please Goodd !!..I know You're there and You can hear me..😤"
I'm tired already, and I need some divine attention, to end this up ! I just..want the final step..😔
*
So..where are you now,"my love"?.. 😢
I'm sure that you could help me to end up this struggle..
You promised me,that you,the love of my life, ( like you used to call yourself ) will always be with me, till The End,you used to say that to me. Do you Remember, my love?.. I didn't know what was the meaning of "The End" for you.. And as I know you.. you would have said to me right now, that I'm a bad girl and I need a punishment for refusing to learn more..and more.. If only you could hear me.. Endurance..Limitless..
I remember when you use to call my name,to demand me to stay only with you, to "breath you", because I will always be safe and protected only in your arms.. No one can have me, but only you,you use to say to me.I was your angel, falling for your cruel love, turned into a brainless ghost, and you ripped off my wings,and kept them under your boots, but in change you teached and train me how to cross this human boundaries.. kissing my hungry lips (human now) and with a seducing smile on your face, pouring honey and whisky on my body..
" Let it flow, between your beautiful legs, and I will clean you up,and prepare you for what you really need"..
"I see your tears and suffering, and I like it .. this makes you more mine.. yes.. just cry for me.. crave me.. Have some chocolate cake, from my lips,let me feed your needs, and I will drink the whisky from your body and your beautiful mouth..you're only mine ,forever ..never forget this and no one can touch you,but me.. now close your beautiful eyes, fall asleep and wake up in my whispers (sei solo mia, per sempre ) and when you open your eyes, be ready to learn more Pain and Endurance. Don't worry my angel, I will always have patience to teach and guide you through, but you need to obey me, as your master, and you to be my good girl .. now shhh,and suck it all, show me that you are only mine...I know you will learn to love it,so suck until I will stop you with my kisses.. shh, no, you don't breath now, I decide when and how much you can breath,so be a good girl and you won't get punished.. Now,turn around,I want to hear you screaming my name.. "
I cross another boundary, called Pain, like you wanted, but took more time then I thought..(still learning)
But for your love,I did it, and learn to accept it.

The "feeding" was last two years almost,and then.. suddenly happened.My fall begun when I read your cold words,letting me know that I'm too old already now,for you..
My stomach and heart made impact with a new boundary.. Shock. I start to fall.. you pushed my weak body, with just a wave of your fingers.. Destination unknown.. Your last punishment,"my love"..
Was nobody there anymore, to care or even to observe my falling,as you ordered all my friends OUT
I was freezing cold,started to feel again hungry,in a continuously painful decline..
I was screaming out your name,searching for your arms,but I've got another boundary to jump..stopped right in between the lines. Abandon & Fear.
I left behind my tears and disper, scared of a next unknown boundary.Felt the draft, wiping up my body, in my fall, leaving marks and bleeding scars. I could hear my inner voice, begging you to "please..please catch me, my love !..I don't know how to do this jump!..feed me more.."
I wanted to scream again,and again that I'm hungry for you, and please,don't let me fall without my wings..you have them!
But no sound of a voice left my lips anymore.I don't know why.. Silence..?
And I could swear that was a moment, when I might heard a "sorry " word from you,and a.. "here,have a biscuit..cuit..uit.. Neeext ?! .. ext! .?! "..
Hum..a fucking tasteless biscuit,as the chocolate cake has to be saved for a future project, called "family wife & kids" as you told me before my fall begun.
But at least, you let me have "the honour",to learn how to cross,pass my limits ,and to keep moving.. but to try to "stay in touch" , because you might still need me in your life,to advice you how to make another one feeling " Loved ".. so,to not fall to far ..
Oh no-no.. not again that Shock.. I thought that I jumped already this crucial one.. agonising shock ..😓

Boundaries to be cross again and again,in my fall. Stupidity stood in my way too.I managed again to re-jump the Pain ,the Suffering and an unimaginable Asphyxia level,that I never knew is even possible to exist in a human body or a tormented soul, without putting an end to it, but yay.. my journey finished...
Into a cold ground.
At the moment still trying to pass the boundary of Coldness,
Loneliness,
Fear, Confusion,
Madness & that big biach called LOVE, whatever, but..my Nemesis..? is this big fucker,called Time. And I'm still lingering under this massive power,waiting (from my cold ground) the blessed final spark to fade away, just like the dust in the wind .. the End of the transition..

NA :
Have a biscuit, I just finished mine XD
Thank you for "reading" me ..☺