I was awoken suddenly from paws stabbing my side as someone kicked me. I let out an annoyed and very much drawn out meow, then looked over to see the person who had kicked me. And suddenly, my annoyance washed away. A silky ball of black fur was kicking her legs in her sleep, like she was digging. I purred at this, watching the pretty she-cat with amusement that was for sure sparkling in my turquoise eyes.
It took me a moment to come back to reality, and to notice that we were not in Riverclan camp, and that this was not a Riverclan cat. I looked to the sun, feeling relieved when I realized it wasn't early enough for the first morning patrol to come out yet. I took my eyes off Hollyleaf, with much force, and slowly crouched beside the stream we had laid next to. I watched the small minnows flow by, and began to think of how my clan was going to get through Leafbare this time. We'd made it many seasons but there is always a snow cloud of stress laying over our heads.
I was so lost in thought that I hadn't even realized Hollyleaf had appeared beside me until I felt a splash of water against my side. I yelped, jumping back. Hollyleaf threw a fish towards me, mrrowing is amusement. I surely didn't think it was funny. "You need an excuse of where you went while you were out tonight, and hunting would be a good one." Hollyleaf said, a serious but slightly melancholy tone in her voice. I took in these words, soaked them into my brain like a sponge. Then it clicked. She was going to be leaving soon.
"Hollyleaf you don't have to go!" I meowed panickedly. "You can come join my clan, you would fit in and we could take care of each other." I never thought those words would come out of my mouth, considering I am usually unemotional and calm in situations. But Hollyleaf brung out things in myself I didn't know existed. I needed her to show me more. Hollyleaf shook her head, a soft look of pity in her bright emerald eyes.
"As much as I would love to be with you, Quietstar, I don't belong there." Her meows were quiet, but firm. She knew what she needed to do, where she had to go, and why she couldn't be here with me. But I didn't. I needed to know. I walked close to Hollyleaf, licking the top of her head in a comforting gesture. Then I backed up so I could look in her eyes. My voice was soft as I asked,"Why, Hollyleaf? Why don't you belong anywhere, not even with me?" I almost regretted asking because of the sadness, almost anger in her narrowed eyes. She gave me a shake of her head, then replied slowly,"Because Quietstar. I grew u p not belonging. To try and belong now would be like you trying to live in Thunderclan." She wrapped her tail around mine and touched my nose to hers. The moment was so long, as if it lasted years, but was over in the amount of time a fly flew past your nose.
We walked in silence along the border, having crossed to the other side now. All we needed were each others presence, just enough to let us think and hear our heartbeats through the ache of each others'. The sand between my pads was starting to turn to gravel as we neared the edge, and soon we were back around to the log that connected the Island to the territories. We turned to each other, sharing tongues for the last time that moon. She turned to me as she stood up to leave, purring happily,"I'll be here every gathering, whenever you want to see me." My chest ached at that, but I purred with her because, even though it would only be once every moon, I still got to see her.
~~~
It's been many moons since that day I met Hollyleaf, with me having kits of strong ginger fur and smooth mixed colored pelts like mine, all having bright blue eyes. I love my mate, Gingernose, and my kits, Specklekit, Archkit, Heronkit and Branchkit. But old love never truly goes away, and I will never not be happy to see those pair of bright emerald eyes gleaming at me from the shadows every full moon. My pretty shadow who never belonged in the light. My Hollyleaf.
Requested by @QueenPoisonStar
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