He Loves Me Not

Ch.14

Adeline was pushing the shopping cart, examining the stuffed animals.

"How about a Penguin?" Theo asked, picking up the 50 dollar plushie.

She frowned,

"No, he wouldn't like that. I want to get him an elephant."

"Right..." Theo muttered as he followed Adeline through the toy store.

She then stopped in front of the dumbo elephant plushies and couldn't help but smile. She picked it up and examined it. This was perfect.

"This one. I want this one." Adeline announced as she placed the plushie in the cart.

Theo wanted to argue how they should get something bigger, but then again he couldn't possibly understand what Adeline was feeling. Watching her pick up a stuffed animal and quickly saying whether their son would like it or not was something he could never do. He never met him, he never saw him, and that will forever haunt him. It simply amazed him how her maternal instincts knew what their son would like, even though they were never given the chance to hear what their son would have to say or see how he reacts to things he likes. 

**

As the 2 were in the car Theo was driving as Adeline sat in the passenger's seat.

"Turn left here." Adeline pointed out, once seeing the familiar sign of the cemetery. 

Once in the parking Lot, the 2 got out of the car grab their bags and Adeline took the lead. Seeing all the tombstones gave Theo this chilling feeling. And then seeing all the people who were mourning over the loss of their loved one made him feel even worse. He was so lost in thought, he didn't even notice that Adeline stopped walking. He was confused at first but it finally hit him. They were here.  Adeline took a step to the side and revealed their son's tombstone to Theo.

Here Lies Asher Fox, 

You have touched our lives for the briefest moment, but you will stay with us forever

December 12, 2015

Adeline gently placed the little plushie next to his tombstone, and then the flowers. She then continued to wipe off any dirt that was on the tombstone. When she was done, she opened her backpack and pulled out a blanket. She placed it on the ground and took a seat. Theo looked down at her, and she rolled her eyes. She moved over and patted the spot where he would sit. 

"Do you think he knows we are here?" Theo asked, then feeling stupid right afterwards.

Adeline smiled at his question,

"I think he is always there with me. I don't know why, but I know he is by my side being my little guardian angel. And weirdly enough I think he is looking out for you too." 

"I can only hope that whenever I meet him again, that he can forgive me for what I did to you 2." Theo admitted one of his worst fears.

Then, there was a silence between them. Though it wasn't one of those awkward silence. It was a moment of silence for their child. During that little moment the 2 sent their prayers, respects, self-reflection. And then Adeline realized that this was the perfect time for the 2 to finally talk.  

She then spoke up,

"I can never forgive you for what you did to me. To us... I could never love you the way I did 4 years ago. I can never see you as the same person you were 4 years ago. But just sitting here, I know Asher would not want his mom and dad to spend the rest of their lives hating each other. And for a brief moment, the idea of not hating you came to mind. Like I said, we can never be together like what we were 4 years ago. But instead we can be something else. Friends. Eventually, you are going to find another person in your life. And you are going to love them, and want to spend the rest of your life with. Same with me. One day I'll meet that person. And we will both move on. I can only hope that this friendship can bring out the best in us. I can only hope that we can keep a friendship, a friendship with respect and a common goal. To live out our lives to the best possible, to live out the life our son can never have. To never let our son down."

Theo stared at her through her entire speech. He nodded his head and knew this was the time to speak,

"You will always be my first love. The first woman who stole my heart. The mother to our son. And I will always be in debt to you for that. I don't think there is anyone else in this world I could love more, than how much I love you. But I respect you and your decisions. I promise to you that I won't court you again. I will not bother you with anything related to that again. But I do know this. I will help you. I will help you win this case, because it is the least I can do for you after everything I have done to you. I'm in Adeline, and I am not leaving. Not this time. I'm staying."