Your Smile.

Your Smile: 2.The Letter

'Dear Germany,

Hey, brother. I'm sorry about all this... I didn't want to bother you any more than I already was. I have so much to tell you, too much, actually... but you don't really listen to me these days (not that I'm complaining; you are no longer a child).

By the time you read this, I won't be there to be on the receiving end of the lecture you probably have already planned; so, if you don't want to keep listening to ramblings even after I don't have a voice, throw this paper away, and I'll be gone forever for good; but I'm going to ask you to read till the end, one last request from your no longer awesome big brother...

Firstly, you must know this. I AM PROUD OF YOU. So proud. You've grown up so much and so well, I couldn't be happier. But just because I am no longer a country does not mean I'm not selfish; I am, I still am. I know it's cruel of me to say so, but I sometimes still wish I could see my little Germany looking up to me with a sparkle in his eyes... Well, I'm not surprised I will no longer see it, after all, stealing that spark was my doing, with my blood lust and hunger for power and thirst for revenge, dragging you through the pits with me, the very pits of Hell I had sworn to protect you from.

I do understand why you would no longer find me of any interest; I'm no longer the brother you first knew, neither are you the curious little boy with big dreams. The hard times I've forced you through have hardened you... and it stings, but I'm glad.

I'm sorry for being such a burden to you these days. I was the one supposed to protect you, but here I am, living on your charity... How disgraceful, to go from a mighty kingdom all feared, to a parasite living off his little brother's pity... I guess you won't really understand, and I pray with all of what's left of me that you never have to.

Also, there is no need for you to come to me for closure anymore... You have made some pretty loyal friends, and I have no right to keep you for myself when your heart clearly is with them.

And I'm sorry about my behaviour as well. I know you don't like me fooling about with that little camera or screwing around in the streets... I'm just trying to live a bit of my childhood, though my time is long past...

Please forgive me, brother. Though I barely deserve it. I've failed in all my promises to you. I hope you'll be able to move on with your life now, once I'm gone. You can finally work on your dreams of the future, after your past is gone for good.

Now, another request. Bear with me please?
Please be careful with the one who gave you my letter. Please don't hurt Austria with this anymore, I've probably looked into that more than needed. He'll help you, if you still ever have need of it. He can do much better than me. Maybe things never would have gone downhill for you if I had let him raise from the beginning, but I was selfish, like I always am... So let me take this chance to tell you why you had to put up with such a horrible existence... don't worry, no one will mistreat you once I'm gone.

Before you were born, there was no singular nation, only a group of smaller tribes... my brothers. It should not really surprise you that they all hated me, but couldn't do anything because I was stronger... You never got to see them, but you wouldn't have lived if they had... I slaughtered them all. Their blood has never washed off my hands, but I don't regret it as much as I should. I had you, and that was enough. I know you've always wondered why Germania was so cold ... I killed his favoured children to save a little boy who I wished to raise as my own redemption. I killed my own brothers. I also abandoned my lover, only because I wanted to make you everything I couldn't be... I wanted you to become the best there is, so that I could have something bright in my legacy written in the blood of others...

Well, I know you can't really stand me these days, but I don't really know how else to get your eyes on me. At least, if you hate me, means you remember me, right? But it's better if I am forgotten. It shouldn't be too hard for you now, though I remember the little Germany who would idolise me... but that's a long time ago.