It's my twenty first birthday and I've been given a message in a bottle from my dad to read, but I'm scared to open it for fear of what it will say. Before I tell you what it says, and why it's in a bottle, I better start form the beginning.
You see, my story starts when I was nine, well actually it's my dad's story and it starts long before I was born, but nine was the age I started to appreciate it all. When my dad was seventeen he joined the Royal Marines, at twenty eight he became captain. At thirty it all started to go wrong.
The incident happened one stormy night in April when my dad was away. At the time I understood that my dad went to work on a big ship and helped other people, but I didn't understand the dangers of being a Marine or much about them, I just knew it was my dad's dream.
I heard my mum talking in the living room that night, so I went in to see who she was talking to, but it turned out she was on the phone. I immediately knew something was wrong as she was pacing up and down with tears in her eyes. I stayed by the door and waited until she hung up, listening to my mum's replies to try and understand what was going on.
“Yes, this is Captain Watson's wife … Are you sure? You've not made a mistake? … Yes, of course, I'll be down there in the morning … What's the chance of him not survi-,” at this reply she sunk down onto the sofa and barely restrained her tears, “well thank-you, you're doing everything you can … Thank-you, bye.”
“Mummy, whose in hospital? Is it daddy?” As a nine year old I was quite perceptive, as most young children are, so my mum knew better than to hide something from me once I'd already figured it out, I would find out the rest in the end anyway, one way or another.
“Honey, daddy has been in a little accident with the boats and he's in hospital, he might be in there for a little while.
“But he will come back, won't he?”
“I hope so,” her voice went thick with the tears she was trying to hold back, “but daddy is very poorly, honey.”
“I want to go the hospital with you tomorrow.”
By now she was beyond words and she just nodded her head, sadly.
I realised when I was older that my mum must have realized just how bad my dad's condition was because she didn't put up much of a fight about letting me see him. She probably knew she would have felt guilty if he died and I hadn't seen him one last time.
The morning came and my mum was tearful on the drive to the hospital but managed to pull it together once we got there, probably for my dad's benefit. I wish I could say the same, I was always a daddy's girl and one look at my dad, pale and led on a hospital bed with tubes and wires stuck to him was upsetting.
“Daddy,” I stood by his bed and held his hand, then my tears started to escape. As I took his hand he woke up.
“Don't cry, daddy is going to be alright,” he stroked my hair as he reassured me, “but I want you to remember something for me. Do you remember the first time we went to the beach? When I first became captain?” I nodded and he carried on, “do you remember what we found?”
“A message in a bottle,” I said, remembering the night well. I was seven and my dad had just been made captain, so he took me for a walk on the beach to explain it all. I'll always remember what he said to me that day- 'Honey, I love you and your mummy so very much, but I've been given a better job on the big ships so that means I'll be away more and I'll be gone for longer, but I will be back before you have time to miss me. But if you ever want to talk to me, send me a message in a bottle and it will reach me wherever I am.'
“And do you remember what it said?” I shook my head, “ 'you don't know what the future holds, so act like every moment is your last and make every day count.' You might not understand that now, but remember those words because one day you will.” At that my mum, who was stood holding my dad's other hand. broke down crying and I promised to myself that I would remember the message and when I'm older, I'll understand it too.
For the rest of the day we talked about old memories, played all of our favourite songs and ate our favourite meals. Dad started to get tired around nine o'clock so me and my mum said out goodbyes and stood up to leave.
“I love you two so much, remember that.” My dad said, his breathing becoming hard and strained.
“Daddy are you okay?” As soon as I finished my question the heart monitor started to beep rapidly and my mum took me out of the room as the nurses rushed in. “Daddy!” I cried, I didn't fully understand what was going on, but I had an idea. My mum tried to comfort me but she too had tears in her eyes. I looked through the window as I cried, watching doctors and nurses rushing around him for about half an hour before one of the older nurses came out.
“I'm sorry, we did everything we could but his heart just wasn't strong enough.”
My mum nodded and started crying then turned to me, “honey, daddy has gone now, he's gone to a better place.”
So that is why on my twenty first birthday I'm reading a message in a bottle from my dad, the dad I lost when I was nine years old.
Rachel,
I'm sorry I wasn't there to watch you grow up. I know it must have been difficult growing up without your dad, but I want you to know that I was always there with you every step of the way. I'm always watching over you and your mum in whatever you do, I never left, not really. Follow your dreams, sweetheart, and if you ever want to talk, just send me a message in a bottle. It'll reach me wherever I am.
I love you.
A single tear drop landed on the paper, slightly blurring the ink.
“I love you too, Daddy.”
