I̶n̶f̶a̶t̶u̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n

Chapter 16-- Chanse

I awoke to bright sunlight streaming through the hospital room window. Evan was seated in the bay window, earbuds in his ears. Looking up from his phone, he noticed my gaze and immediately put it aside, moving to stand beside my bed.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, his tall figure towering over me.

"Better," I said. "A little tired, though not as much as I was."

"I bet," he replied. "Do you want anything? Food? Water?"

"No, thank you, I'm good," I replied. "Have you been here all night?"

"Yeah, I have. My dad knows that I'm out, though, so don't worry about that. I told him I wouldn't be home for a while and, if he needed me, that I would be here."

It warmed my heart to know that he'd been here, waiting for me. "Thank you for waiting."

"Of course," he replied, a look in his eyes that I'd never seen before. "I would wait as long as I needed to for you."

My cheeks felt flushed. "Thank you," I repeated.

"No problem. You sure there's nothing that you want?"

"Nothing that I can think of at the moment, no. Unless you have my phone?"

"I don't, but your mom might. Is there something you're wanting to do on it? Specifically."

"I was just going to put an earbud in," I said with a small laugh. "Listening to my music always makes me feel better."

"Well I don't know how much of my music would be like yours, but you're welcome to listen to any music on my playlist," he said, handing me his phone. The earbuds were still plugged in. I scrolled through his songs. Cemetery Gates, Good Friends and a Bottle of Pills, Never Wrong, 45, Devil, Sound of Madness, S.E.X, Something In Your Mouth. There was more, a lot more, but I hadn't heard of over half of them. But he was trying, and I was grateful for the music, so I put an earbud in any way. I clicked on one of the few that I actually knew; Something In Your Mouth. It was Nickelback and, while I probably didn't know as many of their songs as he did, I did know quite a few.

"Are those songs okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, they're great. I haven't heard of a lot of them, to be honest. But it gives me a chance to try something new, you know?" I smiled.

"Yeah. They're not for everyone, it's real rock, not like Breaking Benjamin or Three Days Grace. This is real rock. I'm talking about Puddle of Mudd, Pantera, Godsmack, Korn."

He was passionate about his music, anyone could see that. It was important to him, and I suppose it was even his outlet at times. Just as my earbuds were my way to tune out the world and all of its problems. His music was his outlet to all of his emotions; the anger, pain, sadness. I wanted to listen to all of the songs that he did. It made me feel closer to him; like I could understand him and his thoughts better by listening to the music that he did. I wish I had a copy of his playlist because there was no way I was going to get to listen to all of the songs before either he had to go or I had to.

"Hey, is there any way you could send me some of these songs? Recommend some for me? I generally like rock music, but I also want to expand my horizons, hear new kinds of rock and try listening to what you call 'real rock'." It sounded subtle enough, I hoped he wouldn't catch on to my real reason for wanting to listen to them.

"Sure, I can recommend a whole bunch of songs for you. I'll bring you a list."

I couldn't help the wide smile that had formed. "Great! I look forward to it. I'll listen to every song you put on there. Well, eventually, I'm sure."