I cant hear him anymore, I see his mouth moving but I cant hear it. My vision gone foggy. His eyes are glassy with tears, his short black hairs in a mess, I always knew this would happen, but I didnt think it would hurt as much as it does. I always taught myself not to shown what I feel, to block it out, to let no one in but he came and destroyed all that and now hes destroying me.
I dont want to look at him, his adorable face I fell for, I dont want to, I cant.
I run out of his house, slamming the white door behind me, I can vaguely hear him calling out my name but I dont care I keep running, black, white and blue houses all blur together as I run. I want to go home.
I trip over my feet, my hands start to turn crimson with my blood, I rise up to my feet and continue running.
I soon see my house in the distance, I can feel tears dripping down my face but I dont care, bloods dipping down my hands but I dont care, it stings and I like it so its fine.
I finally reach my house, my hands are shaky as I try to unlock my door. As I enter I see a photo of me and him hanging on my wall, I start hysterically laughing through my tears, Im sure anyone that hears would think Im insane but that ok. I took the photo down and throw it, the glass shatters and goes in all corners of my room.
I pick up a piece a glass. Ive always had this habit, he helped, he took away what Id normally use and I was fine with it but Im not fine now, I wish I had them but this will do.
I head up to my bathroom, I sit on the cold tiled floor, I pull my sleeve up, bring the glass to my skin and push down and across, down and across, down and across, over and over and over. I'm still laughing, I dont know why and I dont care. tears are still streaming down my face, blood streaming down my arms, but my laughter could be heard miles away.
I look down at my arm, I stare at my old scars, these ones will heal just like them, they always do but I dont.
