PUNISHED FOR BEING ME

CHAPTER 8

"NO, THAT CANT BE POSSIBLE. PLEASE YOU ARE JOKING"

"I AM SORRY TO SAY, BUT ITS TRUE RAM. EVERY SINGLE WORD OF WHAT I TOLD YOU IS TRUE."

"I AM COMING BACK TOMORROW," I SAID AS TEARS STARTED ROLLING DOWN MY CHEEKS.

I FRANTICALLY STARTED COLLECTING MY THINGS AND PACKING THEM. MY HANDS WERE TREMBLING TO AN EXTENT THAT I HAD TO STRUGGLE WITH THE ZIP FOR ABOUT THREE MINUTES TO SHUT THE BAG CLOSE. HEARING THE COMMOTION, MY PARENTS CAME TO MY ROOM AND WERE SHOCKED TO SEE ME PACKING.

"YOU ARE LEAVING ALREADY? WHAT'S THE MATTER RAM ?"

I WAS STANDING WITH MY BACK TOWARDS THEM AND SO THEY COULDNT SEE ME CRYING.

"SOMETHING HAS HAPPENED BACK IN COLLEGE. I NEED TO GO BACK." I SAID IN A SHAKY VOICE.

"WHAT HAPPENED BETA? TELL US MAYBE WE CAN HELP"

"ITS SOMETHING THAT I NEED TO DEAL BY MY OWN. DONT WORRY, I WILL CALL YOU WHEN I REACH."

I CAUGHT THE FIRST BUS OUT OF KRISHNA NAGAR NEXT MORNING. I COULDNT BELIEVE THE NEWS THAT MY ROOMMATE, MANAV, TOLD ME LAST NIGHT. MY EYES WERE DRY FROM CRYING THE FULL NIGHT. I WANTED TO CRY MORE, BUT THE TEARS WOULDNT COME. I WANTED TO HUG PRATIK AND TELL HIM EVERYTHING, BUT IT WAS SOMETHING THAT WASNT POSSIBLE GIVEN THE DIRE CIRCUMSTANCES.

I REACHED THE CAMPUS THAT EVENING. MANAV HAD COME TO PICK ME UP AT THE BUST STOP NEAR THE COLLEGE. AS SOON AS I STEPPED DOWN FROM THE BUS, I RAN TOWARDS HIM AND HUGGED HIM WETTING A PART OF HIS T-SHIRT WITH MY TEARS IN THE PROCESS. HE TOOK ME TO THE 'PLACE OF INTEREST' WHERE IT HAPPENED. YELLOW COLOUR TAPES WERE STRETCHED ACROSS THE AREA. I FELL DOWN ON MY KNEES AFTER SEEING THE HORRIFIC SIGHT. THERE WERE DRIED BLOOD STAINS ALL OVER. THAT DIDNT AFFECT ME AS MUCH AS THE LARGE STAIN OF BLOOD PRESENT CLOSE TO THE CENTER.

"THAT'S THE PLACE WHERE PRATIK'S BODY WAS FOUND," MANAV SAID.

THOUGH HE HAD ALREADY DISCLOSED THIS NEWS TO ME LAST NIGHT, ON HEARING IT AGAIN, MY WORLD STARTED SPINNING. PRATIK WAS FOUND WITH A PICKAXE BURIED IN HIS CHEST, LYING AT THE REAR END OF THE COLLEGE CAMPUS WHICH PEOPLE RARELY VISIT. APPARENTLY, HE WAS FOUND BY A COUPLE WHO SNUCK THERE SPEND SOME QUALITY TIME WHICH TURNED OUT TO BE A NIGHTMARE FOR THEM. I COULDNT GATHER UP THE COURAGE TO LEAVE THE SIGHT AND GO BACK TO MY ROOM. IT WAS SIMILAR TO LEAVING PRATIK BEHIND. I JUST COULDNT DO IT. I ASKED MANAV TO GIVE ME SOME ALONE TIME AND TOLD HIM TO GO BACK TO HIS ROOM.

"YOU SURE DUDE?"

"YES. I WANT TO SPEND SOME TIME ALONE. THIS WAS THE LAST PLACE HE VISITED, I JUST CANT SIMPLY LEAVE."

"WHATEVER YOU WANT BUDDY. CALL ME IF YOU NEED SOMETHING OK."

WITH THAT HE STARTED WALKING TOWARDS THE DORMS.

AS SOON AS HE LEFT, I STARTED DIGGING THROUGH MY BACKPACK.

"THERE WAS A BLADE HERE SOMEWHERE", I MURMURED TO MYSELF.

I FOUND MY SHAVING RAZOR, BROKE OFF ITS BLADE AND WAS ABOUT TO RUN IT OVER MY HAND. THE BLADE HAD JUST TOUCHED THE SURFACE OF MY SKIN WHEN SOMEONE GRABBED MY HAND. I LOOKED UP, IT WAS MY ROOMMATE.

"ARE YOU INSANE? I KNEW LEAVING YOU ALONE WASNT A GOOD IDEA."

HE TOOK THE BLADE FROM MY HAND AND THREW IT AWAY.

"PLEASE LET ME DIE. I CANT LIVE WITH THE FACT THAT I WASNT THERE WITH HIM IN HIS LAST MOMENTS."

"SONT BE A FOOL RAM. YOU CANT BLAME YOURSELF FOR ANYTHING. IF YOU WEREN'T THERE WITH HIM, THAT'S BECAUSE HE BROKE UP WITH YOU. THERE'S NOTHING THAT YOU COULD HAVE DONE. DONT BE SORRY FOR YOURSELF. I KNOW AND CAN UNDERSTAND HOW DIFFICULT IT IS FOR YOU. BUT YOU CANT KILL YOURSELF FOR THAT. BE STRONG. IF YOU NEED ANYTHING, I AM THERE FOR YOU. WE WILL GET OVER IT TOGETHER. DONT WORRY."