Two Rainbows in Stevensville

Chapter 1: Issues

Well, I don't know who is reading this right now, but hopefully, this notebook doesn't fall into the wrong hands. Nah, that's too cliche. I'll just start with an introduction. Hi, my name is Dani, short for Danielle. I hate the name Danielle so I tell everyone to just call me Dani because, to be honest, it fits me more. I'm currently 17 years old and in 11th grade. I live in a small town called Charlesville, Pennsylvania. It is a really religious town. Like religious to the point where if someone is gay, they will be burned at the stake. Just kidding. But they will be treated like trash. Now you may be wondering, "Why is Dani saying this right now?", well dear reader, what's the problem with me living in this highly religious community? Two words, I'm gay.

I mean other than that I'm just like any other person. I hide being gay very well. I always have my black hair down and I keep it long, I personally want to cut my hair like a guy because I feel more comfortable that way. I have dark brown eyes. I'm kind of tall for a girl like around 5'6. But still, I'm gay and no one here likes that.

So yeah as you can see, being gay presents a problem. Well I mean it's 2017 so it's not like I disappoint myself, but it seems like the rest of this dumb town lives in the early 1900s. I can't tell anyone, I can't do anything that will reveal my secret, and on top of that, I have to avoid having any crushes. Imagine a hormonal girl trying to avoid having crushes. Yeah, it's hard to be me. But I'm still a happy teenager so I got that going for me. Sadly, if anyone and I mean ANYONE, finds out about me. Welp to put into another two words. I'm fucked.

Of course in a religious community comes a religious school. Now here's the fun part of going to school. I go to the Christian School for Educated Girls. Let me repeat that The Christian School for Educated GIRLS. I go to a school that is only FOR GIRLS. As if having to hide the fact that I'm gay wasn't hard before. It's harder now. I have no boys to "like" so that I can blend in with the other girls. So every day I have to go to school with this massive fear that I will be exposed which is SO much fun. I know you are reading this and can't understand how much sarcasm I just put in that sentence but just imagine it.

So that's my life in a short three paragraphs. But hey, there's a lot to talk about. Anyways, today is another day at school and I, again, am sitting in math class and writing everything going on in life. Of course, every time my math teacher passes by I have to hurry and hide this notebook so that she doesn't grab it and read it in front of the class. Mrs. Lancaster is the worse teacher in the school. She's the most racist, homophobic, sexist pig I've ever met. But at least after Math, I have Chemistry. I love Mrs. Henderson. She is a really fun teacher and she finds interactive ways to do experiments.

Of course, for me, the days go really slow. Still, one more year until I can leave this dumb town. But my parents are probably going to make me go to another religious school. My older sister went to one and she is doing fine. Granted she isn't like me. What I dream of is going to New York City. A big city that will accept me the way I am, no matter if I'm gay, straight, bi, queer or trans. But my parents will never let me go to a city that's so culturally diverse. They are probably going to send me to the same school my sister went to.

Don't get me wrong I love this little town. Even though I have no friends and can't live the life of a normal teenager. I love this tiny town. Unless my secret is revealed I'll be fine for the next year. But who knows if I can keep it hidden until then.